Renewed Day by Day

Luke, the Great

2008-08-29T14:42:00.008-05:00

In the last few weeks, I have been grumbling a lot about Luke's growing independence. I thank God that Luke thinks for himself and is learning to assert himself. I just wish he could do so while obeying my every request. Pop and Granny remind me that God made 2-year olds so cute so that parents would still love them through this challenging stage. So, rather than bemoaning the latest challenges, I want to share with you some of the wonderful things about my incredible son. (in no particular order)

1. He loves his daddy and tries to be just like him.

2. He likes to be helpful. This morning, he helped me make the bed. I didn't ask for his help. He just started tugging on the covers. He threw pillows up onto the bed for me as well. He often helps me move laundry from the washer to the dryer. He always runs to get them mail when he hears it fall through the mail slot. He is kindhearted.

3. The faces he makes. The sounds he makes. The things he says. His laughter. This morning we took a walk around the neighborhood. I had constant commentary. He pointed out what was blue and yellow. Part of the time he just sang. He pointed out every basketball hoop along the way.

4. I love that he loves his cousins. Amelia is his best buddy. He also thinks very highly of Micah, Noah, Sam, and Will.

5. I love the way he pats me on the back when he hugs me.

6. I love the way he never really hesitates when I ask for a kiss. He just says, "uh-huh," pulls the pacifier out, and puckers up.

7. I love how he thinks. How inquisitive he is and how he remembers details. He has always studied the world around him. He soaks it all in.

8. I love how he counts, "1, 4, 8, 9, 10!" Or, how he always answers there is four of whatever.

9. I love how "alligator" and "elevator" sound exactly the same.

10. I love how he loves the out doors. He is a boy through and through. I love how when playing with Amelia, he will put his football or cars in the stroller and then push them around the house. I love how he tells me his toys are cold before covering them up with a blanket.

11. I love how he gets so excited about cake. And chocolate. I love how when he first started talking, 9 times out of 10 his first word in the morning was "chwoc-late." I enjoy that he still says it "chwoc-late." Several months ago, we were at my parents for my dad's birthday. I told Luke to go tell Pop happy birthday. Luke walked up to him and said, "Happy Birthday, Pop! Cake?!?!?!?!"

12. One evening, I tried to get Luke to pee-pee in the potty before his bath. He excitedly sat on the potty and tried to go. But, he must not have need to, because nothing happened. He then looked at me and very earnestly said, "Not working." The next day, I asked him if he would like to go pee-pee on teh potty, and his eyes got that intense look they get and he told me, "That potty not working!"

13. I love his eyes.

14. I love his smile, even when it is behind a pacifier.

15. I love that he never tires of throwing rocks, especially if they are being thrown into water.

16. I love how he wants everything to be in its proper place...unless he doesn't want it to be.

17. I love the way he runs, especially when he hunches up his shoulders, says "Hut! Go!" and takes off.

18. I love how he wants Mommy to build blocks with him. I love the way he laughs with glee when he knocks my tower down.

19. I love the way he asked to sit on the floor rather than in Mommy or Daddy's lap the other night when we said bed-time prayers. He was such a big boy, holding our hands, and bowing his head, though peaking around the room.

20. I love the way he says, "I love you, Mommy."

Woo Hoo!!

2008-07-01T14:50:00.003-05:00

I am so excited! I will be joining Christianne and Sarah in visiting Kirsten in Bellingham in August!!

WOOOOO HOOOOO!!!!!

2008-05-29T15:39:00.006-05:00

Pop and Granny gave Luke what he calls a playground for his birthday. We have taken to going out to the playground in the mornings before it gets too hot. This morning, I thought to grab my camera before he was through playing. I had so much fun taking pictures. I had a hard time narrowing them down, so you are now inundated with many pictures of my favorite subject.
Unfortunately, Luke's new playground is in much need of maintenance. Good thing for us, Luke is a well-qualified and experienced handyman.

By the way, today is a pajama day - or at least a pajama top and diaper day. I try to give Luke one day a week in which he can stay in his pajamas or diaper all day. He loves it.

Heavy lifting requires help from the tongue.

Oh so serious!He is very concerned about a small piece of plastic that is sticking off the wall.

This is the "Yes" face - he is in the middle of saying, "yesh."

Still working on that piece of plastic.

Six Random Things

2008-05-29T10:17:00.003-05:00

Thanks for the tag, Christianne! This was fun.

1. I don’t chew gum, because I have recurring nightmares about gum. I dream that I am done with my gum. I try to spit it out, but it is stuck in my teeth. At this point I reach in to pull it out. I pull out a glob, thinking it is gone, only to find that there is more stuck between my teeth. So, I reach back in and pull, and pull, and pull, and pull…

2. While in seminary, mostly because she told me I could never lie to her convincingly, I stole Lisa Jones’ remote control. She had entrusted me with a key to her apartment. I dropped by one day when I knew she would not be there, slipped in, and took it. She asked me about it the next day at school. I told her I did not have her remote, technically not a lie. I had already placed it in the mail, and it was on its way back to her. She spend the next day or two searching through her apartment, convinced that I had not taken it.

3. I enjoy cooking. I especially enjoy making bread - maybe because I love eating bread. My bread does not always turn out great, but I am learning.

4. I nearly drowned in my Grandparents’ pool when I was little. It was early in the morning. I was playing on the pool steps. My brother was playing in the deep end of the pool. I was on the last step, but thought I had one more to go. I stepped off and went under. I remember trying my hardest to get to the surface, but I was going nowhere. My mother was sitting on the side of the pool, but her attention was elsewhere at the moment. She looked back to find me paddling away and going nowhere beneath the surface. In somewhat of a panic, she began pulling off her robe. My dad yelled at her from across the yard, “Don’t worry about your clothes! Get in and get her!” Mom jumped in, nightgown, robe, house shoes, and all. I was never so glad to feel her arms swoop me up. Perhaps this is why I don’t like putting my head under water.

5. I cannot whistle. Nor can I roll my tongue.

6. I have never changed my hair color – no dye, no bleach, not even the wash out in a few days kind.

I'd love to hear six random things from Candace, Kristy, Christi, and Elizabeth.

Birthday

2008-03-28T08:08:00.002-05:00

Earlier this month, I entered the 30s club. As my birthday fell on the church's Parent's Night Out for March, we thought it was the perfect opportunity to get our friends together for a little party. My sweet friend Candace took some pictures and posted them on her blog. I am so blessed to be surrounded by loving friends and family.

Moving Forward

2008-03-17T10:15:00.000-05:00

Sometime in August of last year, it became next to impossible for me to focus during the worship service on Sunday morning. Adam and I attend the Gathering, a non-traditional, more contemporary service offered at our church. There are three Godly teachers who share the teaching responsibilities for the service. It didn’t matter which teacher stood before us with God’s Word, from the time the musical worship ended and we sat to listen, all I could think about was my vision for the Women’s Ministry of my church (PDBC). I would pray about the deficits I saw and yearn to share what I had learned in my 9 years of training. I would present a case in my head for the need to pay the current Women’s Ministry director and pray for wisdom on who to talk to about it. I would also sit and try to coax myself to patience. I told myself over and over, now is not the time for me to be in Women’s Ministry. After all, I am too young. No one wants a 30-year old in charge of their Women’s Ministry. And, I need to wait until Luke and hopefully another child to enter school before I can take on a profession. It is highly important to me to raise my own children, to be the one at home with them, teaching them the basics of life and loving God. At the end of each sermon, there would be a time of response. During this time, all I could do was tell God over and over, “I am your servant. Please show me how to serve you.”

I only shared my heart’s turmoil with God and Adam. My sweet husband was and is a source of encouragement. He is always confident of my abilities. He believes that God has blessed me with talent that must be used for God’s glory. He listened patiently as I poured out my desires and vision and fear over and over again. He prayed.

Then, on Sunday, February 17th, Adam and I were returning from a marriage retreat, driving with our friends. I sat with Debbie in the backseat, chatting away while the men had their own conversation in the front. The feeling that I should share my vision with Debbie grew as the miles passed. I took a deep breath and laid it all out to her. Now, one thing you should now about my friend Debbie is that she can pray. When they thought up the phrase “prayer warrior” it was Debbie they were thinking about. When it comes to prayer, this woman is Maximus in Gladiator. She has the biggest rippling prayer muscles I have ever seen and she knows how to use them. So, I decided if I was going to enlist the aid of a prayer general, it should be her. She listened with excitement as I told her my thoughts, hopes, and worries. She agreed to pray with me about the direction God wants to take PDBC’s Women’s Ministry.

The following week, I felt God urging me to talk with another lady from my church. Donna is the Mentor Mom in our Mothers Reaching Mothers group (the one I have been heading up since July). I met with her on the following Tuesday, February 19th. I presented all my vision to her, emphasizing that I did not want the current Women’s Minister to feel like I thought she was doing a bad job or that I was seeking to take her job. I simply felt that God was calling me to share my training and serve him in PDBC’s Women’s Ministry. I shared with her that I was excited about how far the Women’s Ministry had come since I had left for college twelve years ago. In the time I had been gone, the women of PDBC had created the women’s ministry. It didn’t even exist in the years of my growing up. However, I also shared with her that I thought it was time to take things to the next level, and I had training in this very area.

Donna was excited to hear what I had to say. She revealed to me that she was actually the first Women’s Ministry Director and Leslie, the woman who had taken over for her was one of her best friends. She encouraged me saying that Leslie would be excited to hear my ideas, which was just what I needed to hear to have the courage to take the next step in calling Leslie for a meeting. At this point I was moving in euphoria at how clear God was making each step.

At this point I also felt that there were three big obstacles that only God could clear. First, I was concerned about offending Leslie. I in no way wanted her to feel like I thought she was doing a poor job. As I saw it, PDBC had a Women’s Minister and so it could not be my time. Second, I felt that my age was a huge obstacle. I was afraid they would all look at me and think I am too young to take on such a position. Third, the position is currently not a paid position. I think this is a problem on many different levels, but I also know that only God can work the strings of the church to create a paid staff position for this role.

So, I arranged to meet with Leslie on Saturday, March 1st. As I laid out my heart to her, her smile grew larger and larger. She explained to me that every August she prays and asks God whether or not he wants her to continue in the position of Women’s Ministry Director. This August, she had felt a release, an assurance that her time in the position had come to an end. She had also been searching for a replacement. She strongly felt that she should train a replacement and not leave the ministry unattended. However, every woman she asked told her they were not the one to take over. And, the last woman she had asked even told her that she felt it was time for a younger woman to take the helm.

I sat stunned. God had just obliterated obstacles one and two. In fact, the people on the other side of the issue had been praying the same prayers only from the other perspective as me. They had been praying for a replacement for Leslie, and that this replacement would be young.

It was made official when the Minister of Education, Leslie, and I met with the Women’s Ministry Team on Sunday, March 9th. I am PDBC’s new Women’s Minister. I am so excited about this. Sometime during the day I met with Leslie, God showed me that this is what he has been preparing me for. This is why he took me to Biola and DTS for training. This is part of why he brought Adam and I back to Abilene. All the training I have received while away from home was so I could bring that training back to minister to my home church. I am blown away by the blessing of being able to give back to the church that has been such an elemental part of my upbringing and faith.

There is still one obstacle left – the issue of salary. Please understand, I do not want to belittle my church in any way. This is an issue now because it has never been an issue before. As I already said, when I left twelve years ago, PDBC didn’t even have a Women’s Ministry. The whole area of Women’s Ministry is new. The women who started PDBC’s Women’s Ministry already had jobs and were happy to volunteer their time for the church. I am the first to come along with the credentials and training and calling for vocational ministry. It is just new territory for the church, and it is an unexpected expense. The church leadership is not opposed to paying a Women’s Minister. It will just take some time and going through the right channels. I would appreciate your prayers for this. Yes, my family could certainly use the money. Living on one teacher’s income is not easy. More importantly, I think it is vital for this to be a paid position to give legitimacy to the ministry. The Women’s Ministry has always been well supported by the staff, but I think it is time that the women of the church had their own representation on the church staff. God has blown the other obstacles apart, and I know that he can take care of this one, too.

Praise God for he is so good!

Update on Connie

2008-03-04T11:19:00.003-06:00

God is so good!

Connie is doing very well. She has been moved out of ICU and is in her own room. They have taken her off sedation, so she is alert. The ventilator has been removed as has her feeding tube. So, she is breathing and eating on her own. Praise God!

They have fitter her for a helmet and started physical therapy. She is now able to sit unassisted in an arm chair. She is also able to say a few words, which means she has not lost all ability to speak. Praise God!

Also, the latest MRI shows that the clot in her heart, the one that was oh so scary and needed open-heart surgery asap, has completely disappeared. There is still as small clot in her pulmonary artery, but they do not seem as concerned about it. Praise God!

All in all, she is doing very well. She still has a long way to go, though, so your prayers are still very much appreciated. God is doing so much. He is answering prayer above and beyond all that we have imagined (Eph 3:20). I pray that we will keep this a testimony to God's goodness and give him all the glory.

Praise God!

Learning to Say Yes

2008-03-03T15:53:00.003-06:00

I have been going through Beth Moore's latest Bible study, Stepping Up: A Journey through the Psalms of Ascent. In it, Beth shares several stories about her new grandson. In one account, she shares how she told her daughter to set up as many "yes" situations as possible for her son, because the next three years are going to be full of "no."

So, this afternoon, when Luke clearly communicated that he wanted to take his nap on the green blanket on his floor, I decided to say "yes." He got down on the blanket with his cup. I closed his window shade. I turned off is lamp. He pointed to the overhead light and said, "Light off." (Lately, we must turn on both the lamp and main light in his room for him to play.) I shut the door and walked away.

I peaked back in about ten minutes later, expecting to find him playing with his toys. I was impressed to find him still quietly laying on the floor in his room. He was still awake, though. I asked him if he was going to sleep. His wide blue eyes looked innocently at me as he nodded. So, I once again said, "night-night," closed the door behind me and went about my business.

He has been snoozing soundly for about two hours now. I have to admit, I'm kinda proud of him.

Literary Meme

2008-02-28T11:25:00.002-06:00

It may have taken weeks, but here, finally, is my answer to the literary meme. It may not be as intellectual as some where hoping, but hey, my life just isn't very intellectual these days. =)

1) One book that changed your life. At first, I thought I could not answer this question. After all, if a book changed my life I ought to be able to remember it without gazing over my bookshelves, right? But, I scanned over the shelves anyway.

My eyes stopped on my Bodie Thoene shelf, and I remembered that these books changed my life. Reading Thoene’s Zion Chronicles and Zion Covenant series awakened in my a love for Jewish history and Old Testament. This love has shaped my life as it caused me to choose Bible as my major at Biola, and then go on to pursue a Masters of Theology in Old Testament at Dallas Theological Seminary. Now, I ended up with Th.M. in Women’s Ministry rather than OT, but that is a different story.

2) One book that you have read more than once. I realize that this may reveal my inner geek, but I have read Robert Jordan’s The Wheel of Time series twice, and will probably read the entire thing again and again. When a friend suggested I read this series, he told me that each time the next book comes out, he rereads the entire series. I thought he was a little outside sanity. When I began the series, the first eight books were already published. It was the summer of 2000, I had graduated from college and was waiting for seminary to begin. I sat in my first apartment and read from the time I awoke until my eyes could take no more in the wee hours of the morning. I anxiously awaited the arrival of book 9 that fall, and then forsook all homework to devour its entire 766 pages one weekend. Two years later, I excitedly took up book 10, but soon realized that I didn’t remember who half the characters were. I plugged along thinking it would soon come back to me. Some of it did. However, when I heard that book eleven would soon be available, I started back at book one and indulged my way through ten pure dessert books.

Jordan is a master story-teller. He literally has 100s of characters, each with his or her own personality. The second time through was almost like reading it the first time. There is so much there there, that I think it will always be like reading it fresh. One of my favorite things about Jordan is that his female characters think and act like we girls do. He is the only male author I have ever read who truly captures the mind of a woman. I find that most male authors write females who are really men in the role of women. Also, Jordan believes in a world of right and wrong, which is reflected in his work. Though heroes have flaws and villains may occasionally do the right thing for the right reason, evil is evil and good is good. There is no wishy-washy morality.

Sadly, Jordan, who’s real name is James Oliver Rigney, Jr., passed away in September from a rare blood disease. The twelfth and final book of the series is now set to be finished by Brandon Sanderson. I await its arrival in Dec 09 with mixed feelings.

3) One book you would want on a desert island. Okay, at the risk of sounding cliché and artificially holy, I am going to give my truthful answer – the Bible. I am afraid I would get bored with anything else. I also think that perhaps a deserted island would be an excellent chance to have the time to delve into the depths of Scripture. What can I say? I’m a seminarian. My favorite literature is the written Word.

4) Two books that made you laugh. See How They Run: An Energizing Guide to Keeping up with Your Turbo-Toddler by Lorilee Craker. Adam’s Aunt Joan gave me this one for Christmas. I think I laugh at least once a chapter. I don’t know if it is truly funny, or if I laugh out of sheer gratitude that other mommies are going through the same things I am. In the midst of great story telling, Craker also gives great advice on how to handle toddlerhood and insight into the quirky mind of toddlers.

And…well…do Buffy the Vampire Slayer comic books count? Joss Whedon has been doing season 8 of Buffy in comic book form. Each month, my sweet husband picks up the next issue for me. Whedon’s humor makes me laugh. He is anti-Christian, though, so be forewarned.

5) One book that made you cry. Mister God, This Is Anna by Fynn. Lisa Jones gave me this book and it is eye-opening. It is the true story of a man who adopts a little girl off the street and their friendship. Anna is full of spirit and thinks outside the box. I have learned so much, my mind has been opened by the mind of this child.

6) One book you wish you'd written. This may be cheating, but the truthful answer to this question is the book in my mind. Someday it may be written, but today I wish I had written it.

7) One book you wish had never been written. Hatchet by Gary Paulsen. Okay, so I don’t really wish it had never been written. I just wish I was not made to read it in 7th grade. I found it very traumatizing as a young girl. I did reread it a couple years ago and it wasn’t so bad, but I still have a bit o’ bitterness towards it.

8) Two books you are currently reading. Okay, this one makes me laugh, because I could probably fill a page with the titles of books I am currently reading. The combination of a shortage of reading time and an attention span that is increasingly becoming more and more like my toddlers has lead to many book casualties – meaning, I read the first hundred pages or so, sit it down somewhere, and then get excited about something else which I start. So, here is a brief list of books in progress: See How They Run by Lorilee Craker, Mister God, This is Anna by Finn (I realize I have included these in other questions. They are nearly finished.), Moses by Charles Swindoll, Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte, A Jane Austen biography that I can’t even locate currently to tell you the actual title and author, and The Normal Christian Life, by Watchmen Nee. And, do Cooking Light magazines count?

9) One book you've been meaning to read. See above list. And, Blue Like Jazz by Donald Miller. I have heard so many good things about this book. I even picked it up when I found it on sale about a year ago. It is definitely on my to do list.

Please Pray

2008-02-10T15:12:00.000-06:00

I am sitting in a waiting room in Methodist Hospital in Houston. My mother and I drove down here on Friday when we learned that my 22-year old cousin, Connie, had suffered a stroke. She was already in the hospital when the stroke happened, talking to one of her doctors (what Godly timing!). She was emitted due to bloodclots in her lungs.

On Friday, they removed a clot the size of a walnut from her brain, it was what had caused the stroke. Friday afternoon, a three-hour MRI revealed clots in her lungs and a dangerous clot in her heart.

Saturday morning, due to Connie's brain swelling, the neurosurgeon removed her left skull flap to allow room for her swollen brain. She was then moved to the Neurological ICU.

They are keeping her heavily sedated, but we are encouraged because she will tighly squeeze with her left hand when we talk to her, and this morning she opened her eyes. Several times today she has opened her eyes and looked for the person talking.

Please pray for Connie. Pray that she will recover quickly and completely. Also, please pray for her mom and dad. You can imagine what they are going through. Also, please remember my cousin Carrie in your prayers. She is seventeen and being brave through all this.

Also, please pray for her boyfriend, Travis. He has been here by her side through the whole thing. It is so obvious that he loves her deeply. Both her family and his think they are planning on getting married. He is so devoted to her and having a tough time.

Also, her friends have started a group page on Facebook for her called Prayers for Connie. If you are on Facebook, please check out and join the group. It is such an encouragement to her family to see how many people are praying for her.

Thank you.

Snoozing

2008-02-07T13:15:00.000-06:00

I was looking back through the pictures I have taken lately of Luke, and I noticed a theme. We have waking moments, too, but lately his sleeping moments have made me laugh.

Luke has clearly become to tall to sleep sideways in his bed, which explains the bent legs, but if you look closely, he is doing a back bend over a pillow, and there is a cup under his knees. Comfy.

Lately there has been a string of incidents involving things sticking to Luke's face while he sleeps. Here, the pacifier is hanging from behind his ear.

And here, the pacifier is sticking off the side of his face like a cute little horn.
I must confess that there have also been some incidents of fruit chews being stuck to Luke's face, or in his hair. I realize that putting my child in bed with fruit chews is not the wisest parenting move. But, at 4:30a when he is awake and insisting he is hungry, fruit chews mean Mommy can go back to bed for a couple hours.

This one, I just thought was cute. I keep hoping that maybe we can replace the pacifiers with the lamb as Luke's lovey.

And, my favorite. These two are from last night. From birth, Luke has shown himself to be Daddy's boy. It always makes me smile when I look up to find that Luke and Daddy are doing the same thing, sitting the same way, sharing the same expression. Now, they even sleep the same. I only wish you could hear their synchronized snoring.
It was all the better when I walked out of the bathroom to find that they had even turned over together.

I love my boys!

White Thanksgiving

2007-11-28T21:45:00.000-06:00

In typical Texas fashion, we have had crazy weather. I am thanking God that it has finally cooled off. Cool weather means I get to wear my sweaters, and there is nothing better than snuggling up in a sweater.

It snowed on Thanksgiving. Adam and I were in Dallas visiting his family, so we missed it. However, my sweet neighbor Jessica, took a picture of our house. Isn't it beautiful?

It snowed again on Sunday. The biggest, fluffiest snowflakes filled the sky for hours. This was a new coating of white, as the one from Thursday was gone on Friday. Adam and I set up our Christmas tree while Luke took his afternoon nap and the snow gave me holiday tingles.

When Luke woke up, we were anxious to introduce him to snow. He was not impressed. Adam tried to coax him over to touch the snow. Luke kept his distance. This was the closest he got to it. I think he ventured to stick one finger in the white one time.

The tree, on the other hand, was a huge hit. Gasps of oohs and aahs accompanined a very excited pointing finger. So far, every morning when we walk into the living room, he points and the tree and says, "ligh, ligh." We have yet to actually decorate the tree, but it does have lights. I am hoping it will have ornaments on it before Christmas.

I am sorry I have been an unfaithful blogger. I think of you, my blogging friends often and long for a little computer time. Here are some pictures from Halloween. Luke loved his costume. He wore if for several days. I hope you are doing well and enjoying the business of the holiday season.

The Joys of Raising a Boy

2007-09-27T10:49:00.000-05:00

This morning, a boyishly proud Luke walked up to me and handed me a dead rolly-poly. I don't think he killed the rolly-poly. It looks like it has been dead for a while. I said, "Thank you" to my gleaming son. He explained his find in delighted "dohs" and "dahs." Though I may forever treasure the memory, the gift is now trashed.

Blessing of Being Busy

2007-09-27T10:42:00.001-05:00

Life has suddenly become so busy. I have to admit, I like it.

I thought that when school started, things would slow down for me. Adam would be back at work. (Please don't misunderstand. I love having him home during the summer. I am so blessed by him. I also enjoy the routine the school year enforces.) Luke would start Mother's Day Out, giving me two days a week to do my own thing. I thought I would have time to catch up on my reading and my blogging. However, that has not been my story.

I am so excited to share that God has brought several new ministries into my life. At the end of July, I was asked to take over leadership of my church's Mothers Reaching Mothers (MRM) group. I was a little shocked by this. I had only attended four of the twelve meetings they've had since I moved back home. Adam and I prayed over this decision, and were both convinced that this opportunity was from the Lord. MRM’s focus is to minister to moms of young children. We meet once a month, so I thought the commitment would be small. My main role is to find speakers for the monthly meetings. Most of the other duties are taken care of by our amazing leadership team. But, being me, I have made heaps of work for myself. I still have hope that once I get everything organized to my liking, the work time will reduce itself. Even so, I am loving this ministry. I love the women I get to work with in leadership. I love the women who attend the meetings. They minister to me as much as I do to them. I thank God for this unexpected opportunity.

Also with the start of school, the university students are back in town and in our church. About a year ago, Adam and I began to feel called to join the University ministry at our church. However, we were already committed to a year of 5th Grade Sunday School. I must admit that I do not work well with children. They scare me. They smell the fear and pounce. So, us teaching 5th grade SS translated into Adam teaching and me taking roll. I am very good at placing checks next to people’s names. In the College group, I take a more active role. I am on the teaching rotation. In fact, I taught this week. We do a free meal for college students at the church on Sunday nights. I help cook. Adam does dishes. I will soon be starting a mentor group with some girls. Adam and I are both enjoying being a part of this ministry team.

I am also excited to be auditing a class with Adam. In Adam’s masters track at Hardin-Simmons University, he has to take some electives that can be outside the School of Education. So, he chose to take an Old Testament class at Logsdon Seminary. I, of course, jumped on that. I’m lovin’ it. Monday nights are special nights with Adam. We sit in class learning together. Then we get to discuss it all on the way home. And, I don’t have to take tests or write papers. It’s like fresh baked chocolate chip cookies without any of the calories.

God has also blessed me with some new, precious friendships. I have to admit, this is the first time I have felt a connection to other young moms. This means that I tend to fill my Tuesdays and Thursdays with coffee dates or lunch dates that usually run longer than expected with good conversation and lots of laughter.

In addition, I have tried to reserve Tuesdays for working. My gracious father has hired me to do some things for his office and is paying me nicely. And, this time around, some of my work actually draws on my strengths. I am editing some of their training manuals. Yesterday, it took me an hour and a half to get through a page and a half of manual. Not so efficient, I know. But, it’s not easy to translate material written by a computer programmer into professional-sounding, smooth-reading English on a topic I don’t understand. I have hope that the process will speed up as I get further into it.

When I am not working on these things, I am spending my “free” time working on Luke’s Christmas stocking. When Luke was born, Adam requested that I make his stocking. His mom had made their stockings when he and his sisters were little. And, my mom made my brother’s and my stocking when we were little. So, after last Christmas (Luke was 9 months old, he didn’t care that he didn’t have a stocking last year) I searched for a cross-stitch pattern and began working. Well, the pattern went together quickly, so I put it down for a little while to work on my afghan. Then, I decided, in my own personal insanity, that the whole stocking needed to be filled in. I still think it will look better completely stitched, and now that I have marked it up with permanent marker, I have no choice (I am following the black line, not the blue). I just don’t know whether or not it will be done in time to hang on the mantel this Christmas.

I plan on adding some stars over the shepherd boy, and I’ll put Luke’s name at the top. And, there is still some detail work to be done on the shepherd boy. If it is ever finished, it will look nice.

God has blessed me richly over the last few months. Unfortunately, I have not managed my time well enough to make it to the computer very often. But, I am relishing all the activity. I am beginning to see Christin re-emerge from Luke’s Mommy.

Deeper Still Conference in Nashville

2007-09-17T15:54:00.000-05:00

Around January or February of this year, I got a call from my friend Nina in which she said, “My friend Priscilla is doing a conference in Nashville this September. I am going to stay with the Swifties. Do you want to come? Oh, and by the way Beth Moore will be speaking at the conference, too.” I told her to count me in.

A little background on the players:
Nina and I met when I was working at WisdomWorks Ministries while in seminary. During the ’03-’04 season, Nina and I traveled together working the PlanetWisdom Student Conferences for WisdomWorks. We are great travel buddies. When flying, she likes the aisle seat. I like the window. She gets up super early and is through in the bathroom by the time I have to roll out of bed and get dressed in time to race out the door. So, for 19 conferences, we laughed, vented, and encouraged one another. Being the only two women on the travel crew meant that the bond grew deep.

The band that played for the conferences that year was The Swift. (Though they are no longer a band, having retired to spend time with growing families, the Swift have three great CDs you should check out.) The wives of the band member came to each of the conferences. So, Nina and I were blessed with the friendships of these amazing women as well. So, I was quite excited to get a chance to reunite with old friends, meet their new babies, and hear some good Bible teaching.

Downtown Nashville is beautiful:

Friday evening, we met Kelly and Cadle at the conference center, because they had to work during the day. So, Nina and I figured we make our way downtown, park the car, and grab a bite to eat in the city. Good plan except that at least a couple thousand of the 30,000 women in attendance had the same brilliant idea. Nina and I walked from restaurant to restaurant looking for a place that didn't have an hour wait. Finally, we came across this door nestled between two crowded restaurants. This door was complete with a large bouncer and stairwell in the background. There was a menu on the window. Nina and I both found something on the menu that sounded appetizing. So, we inquired of the large man at the door if they were currently serving food. He assured us they were, asked for our IDs, and pointed our way to the elevator. Nina and I were the only two customers in the joint. This place was a bar. Not a bar and grill. Simply a bar. We didn't care. It was air conditioned, and all the other Bible conference ladies must have been intimidated by it. We were seated immediately and served quickly. And, the food was yummy.

The Deeper Still conference was fantastic. We were blessed with front row seats. As guests of Priscilla Shirer, we each had an official sign saving a seat for us. Here's mine:
I didn't mind being "Christine" for the weekend. I enjoyed the "special guest" part too much to mind.

It's a little difficult to see, but the all three tiers abdthe floor of the arena were filled with women.
Mandisa, from American Idol Season 5, sang with the praise team Saturday morning. She also shared her testimony. I am currently enjoying her CD.
Here are Beth Moore, Kay Arthur, and Priscilla Shirer. They each spoke during one two-hour session. Each session flew by. I did not feel as if I had sat through a two hour talk with any of them. At the end of the day on Saturday, they came together for a panel discussion. We were all rolling in the aisles with laughter.
Sorry the picture is fuzzy. I need to read my camera manual.

Nina, Kelly, Cadle, and me in our front row seats.

Sorry this is short and choppy. This hardly covers the amazing gift God gave me in this weekend, but I have come to the realization that if I wait until I have the time and energy to tell the story in its entirety, you will never hear any of it.

Luke's First Day of School

2007-09-04T20:34:00.000-05:00

I cannot believe it has been more than a month since my last post. I was shocked when I read Kirsten’s comment tsking me for leaving August post-free. So, here we go.

Today is the first day of Mother’s Day Out or “school” for Luke. He will be attending Tuesdays and Thursdays this year. I have been looking forward to MDO starting all summer. Five and a half hours, two days a week, all to myself! I have so many things planned to do.

Last night, as I fixed his lunch, and labeled everything with his name, I started getting nervous. This morning when Luke woke up at 5:45 the nerves hit my stomach. I have to admit, he made parting a little easier by insisting on getting up before the sun (he usually sleeps until at least 7:00a), and then spending the morning in destructo mode. Cheerios flew. DVDs scattered. The high chair ended up at the living room window. The rug in Luke’s room is rolled into a heap. His toy shelves are cleared. Fits were thrown. One little diapered tooshy has been spanked. Repeatedly. To no avail. His tears flowed, not in response to being spanked, but in anger and irritation at being told not to do what he wanted. Somehow, Luke and I both ended up clothed. And at 8:45a we happily exited to the garage. Luke pushed the garage door button (a new favorite thing to do), and we loaded up the car.

I felt queasy.

We rolled into the parking lot. I took a deep breath and said a little prayer. I unloaded Luke, grabbed his bag and lunchbox, took his hand, and we trekked to Room 174. We walked into the room and both just stood there, Luke taking in everything going on in the room, me wondering what to do next. Soon, one of his teachers came over to us and asked for any instructions. As I explained about Luke’s cups, pacifiers, and lamb, Luke spotted balls.

I handed his things over to the teacher and noticed he was no longer at my side. He was across the room, one beach ball in his hands, a second at his feet. I called out, “Bye-Bye, Luke.” He briefly glanced at me with a “What? You’re still here?” expression. I left.

The anticipated sense of freedom didn’t come. I was had only a vague, indescribable sense of needing to cry. My list of to-dos evaporated. I knew I wouldn’t be able to accomplish anything. So, I went and sat in my parents’ office. Even at 29 years old, I needed my mommy. I just sat there, gazing through magazines until my lunch appointment.

At 11:00am, I got to meet a new friend for lunch. It was wonderful.

I have now spent most of the last hour aimlessly wondering through my house. There is so much to do, but I can’t focus. I briefly contemplated going to pick Luke up early. Good sense overruled and I came to the computer.

Only 13 minutes left until 2:20p when I can go get my baby.

Mommy Vacation '07 Part 1 - Fly the Friendly Skies - If You Can

2007-07-31T14:02:00.000-05:00

Mommy Vacation ’07 began on a Thursday night in the Dallas metroplex with wonderful Kelly Matlock. Kelly is one of my close friends from college. She is the type friend who, even after months of no contact, I never feel awkward around. We are never at a loss for words. Most times we stay up till single digit hours of the morning talking, something I don’t do easily post-college days. However, with Kelly, time flies, just like those days in the college dorm when we sat in the hallway, taking turns massaging the other’s back, talking (usually about boys), and pretending to read. We of course slept in on Friday, and upon waking resumed talking while enjoying non-fat vanilla lattes from Starbucks.

Being ever conscious to be on time wherever I go, I asked Kelly to drop me off at the airport two hours before my flight time. It took all of five minutes to check my bags and maybe another two to get through security. So, I had ample time to wander through the new American terminal at DFW, scope out all the restaurants, and settle on a pretzel and soda from Auntie Anne’s. Armed with pretzel, drink, and novel, I found a chair and began to enjoy my freedom from responsibility.

I kept an eye on my watch so I could be sure to go to the restroom before boarding began. At the appropriate time, I gathered my belongings and headed across the hall. I returned to the same seat and got a few more pages read before boarding the plane. Once onboard, I painstakingly arranged my belongings for maximum foot room and reachability. I settled into my seat with my book and read until I was joined by the lady sitting next to me. We chatted a little while the other passengers boarded.

I soon noticed that it had been a few minutes since anyone had walked down the aisle, but the plane was far from full. Then, the captain’s voice came over the sound system. Now, I have flown a time or two or ninety in my life. I know that the captain does not usually address the passengers until the plane is cruising at a comfortable altitude. So, I perked my ears and listened (unlike when the flight attendant goes through the safety procedures). He calmly stated that there was a hole in the cargo bay door and instructed all to gather their belongings and get off the plane. He further explained that it should only take an hour to locate another plane. No big deal, I say to myself. I’m on vacation.

I returned to my seat (yes, the exact same one, after all, it and I had grown accustomed to one another) at the gate with some newly acquired fudge and re-immersed myself into my book. At the appropriate time, I trekked across the hall to the bathroom once again, this time noting that a draw back to traveling alone is that one must gather all her belongings, schlep them into the bathroom, try to find a somewhat clean place in the stall to place said belongings while taking care of business, re-gather them, schlep them to the sink, try to find a dry place to put them so one can wash her hands, and then schlep them back to one’s seat.

A new plane was at the gate and ready for boarding in nearly the time they had promised. I re-boarded, re-found my seat, re-painstakingly arranged my belongings, and resettled into my seat. I re-met the lady sitting next to me and began easily chatting with her. Once all passengers were onboard, the flight attendant stopped by to offer a refreshing beverage. (Did I mention I was flying first class? One of the disadvantages of waiting too long to reserve my plane ticket with Advantage Miles. I can’t say that minded much. I really enjoy flying first class.) Making the most of my first class status, I ordered a Chardonnay.

About halfway through my plastic tumbler, I heard the Captain’s voice, “Folks, I am so sorry. I just cannot tell you how sorry I am.” At this point, my higher level reasoning skills kick in and I know that what is to follow is not going to be good. “There is a hole in the cargo bay door. We are going to have to disembark and find a third plane.”

I heard grumblings of “is this some sort of conspiracy?” as I downed the rest of my wine. I shared a laugh with the lady next to me, re-gathered my belongings, and re-walked back up the gangway telling myself, Hey, what does it matter? I am on vacation. I can sit and read my book anywhere.

At this point, I realized that I had yet to eat anything of substance and if I wanted to continue enjoying the perks of flying first class, I needed to find some real food. So, with a rumbling in my belly, I went in search of food for the third time, this time for something a little more substantial. Thus, armed with a big burrito from Blue Mesa, I headed back to my trusty old seat at the gate. However, I began to notice that the now familiar faces from my flight had begun a mass exodus. A little panicked, I asked around and found that they our flight had changed gates and terminals. I joined the migration, walking as quickly as I could, not knowing how long I had to get to the next gate, until I noticed that the entire flight crew, including the captain, was just ahead of me. I relaxed knowing that the plane was going nowhere without el capitan.

I have to admit, though I had been tempted to lose patience, at this point the whole thing had an aura of humor about it. I was actually recognizing the people sitting around me. I talked to a group of college kids who were on their way home from Rome. I talked to the business man who sat across the aisle from me on the previous two planes. I don’t usually interact with strangers. I am shy. (Something I am working on.) This was a new, wonderful, and humorous experience.

Soon we all, now bonded through bad air travel luck (or disguised blessing from God – what if they hadn’t found the holes in the previous two planes?), boarded a third plane.

As we finally left the ground, I rejoiced in God. Though I have flown many times before, I appreciated the view this time. I wondered at the stinky Trinity River flowing through the Dallas Metroplex. I marveled at the clouds floating above and below. I awed that God would allow his people-creations to learn to become airborne.

Fireworks and the Gray Whale

2007-07-05T15:48:00.000-05:00

To celebrate the Fourth of July in true Carr Family tradition, we piled in the Gray Whale and headed to my grandmother’s farm. Now, the Gray Whale is the fifteen passenger van belonging to my dad’s office. “We” included my parents (now called Pop and Granny), my brother Jeff, his wife Cynthia, their children Noah (7), Micah (4 next month), and Amelia (21 months), my cousin Brian, his girlfriend Anne, Adam, Luke, and me. If you’re counting, we had seatbelts for three more people, but then there wouldn’t have been room for the cooler containing lunch. After an hour and forty-five minutes of lively conversation amongst adults, a very competitive showing of the quiet game between Micah and Noah, and Brian and Adam cheering on their favorite and antagonizing the opponent which resulted in waking the babies who napped maybe 30 minutes, we arrived at Grandmother Carr’s.

The boys (small and large) were all very excited, because thanks to this low pressure weather system hanging out over Texas, Grandmother who cannot remember a time in her life when her land has received so much rain, gave the okay to set off fireworks for the first time in more years than my generation can remember. So, after lunch, we trundled to the front yard during the break in the clouds and exploded fireworks. Yes, they would have been more spectacular after dark, but all the kids would have been asleep by then.

By five o’clock all were exhausted, so we piled back into the Gray Whale to head home. Ten minutes down the road, the babies were out cold, as was Micah who succumbed to sleep during another highly charged round of the quiet game, and the adults were once again chatting. Chat morphed into discussion as Anne, an elementary school teacher, reported on her recent trip to Washington DC where she attended a conference on model schools. Each of the “model” schools they looked at used a great deal of technology. Anne began explaining how what our local schools are missing is the technology element.

Perhaps I should have mentioned that my dad owns a software company at which my mother, brother, and cousin work. So, my family jumped on the conversation, enthusiastically cheering the incorporation of technology in the classroom and bemoaning the lack of said technology in our local schools. I sat nodding along until I heard:

“We need to spend much less time making our kids read things like Don Quixote and teach them things that are relevant to the world today.”

Now, if you know me, you are probably thinking that I pounced on that one like a two-year-old on a cookie. But, I am ashamed to say, I sat there too shocked to speak. My horror grew as my family continued to chew over how seventy-five percent of what kids learn in school is useless information, after all, do you really remember and use all that stuff? Who needs Shakespeare? What kids really need these days is technology, technology, technology.

I must admit, I agree technology should be in our schools. I just think it should be a classroom tool rather than the substance of a lesson. Most third graders are far more advanced in technology than I am already. As I see it, kids today don’t need a lesson in how to get the most out of their cell phones. They learn that stuff on their own. I’m not saying we shouldn’t teach our kids how to use the latest technology. I just don’t think that should be the entire substance of education. Newspapers are useful, but they don’t replace literature, something else that was proposed in the belly of the Gray Whale.

We do learn through great works of literature. We learn a higher level of thinking. I acknowledge that in most high school English classrooms, teachers are probably questioning the whats of Romeo and Juliet rather than the whys, but that doesn’t mean that literature is a waste of time. It means we need to better educate our teachers.

This morning as I was getting dressed it hit me how ironic it is that the work that started the discussion in the van was Don Quixote. I hated reading Don Quixote. The uselessness of Don Quixote’s quest irritated my drive to reach people where they are in reality. There he is, so unwilling to move forward with society, so unwilling to let go of the chivalric values that he holds so dear, that he hurts those closest to him for the sake of something that his culture left bleeding in the dust of progress.

Now I sit wondering am I Don Quixote? Do I cling to the educational methods of yesterday because they are what I know and love? Should we move to educate the next generation in what is coming rather than what has been? Where is the balance? What do you think?

Three Wonderful Years

2007-07-03T21:52:00.000-05:00

Today marks three years of marriage for Adam and me. The last three years have been more than I ever could have dreamed up for myself. I have grown in ways I did not know I needed to grow. I have experienced more joy than I thought was possible with another person. I thank God daily for giving me Adam. He is perfect for me. He is not what my childish heart thought I wanted in a husband back when I was full of romanticism. He is better. He is what God knew I needed.

I remember thinking during our first year of marriage If this is the hardest year of marriage as they say, then we have it made. I thought our first year was easy, and as first marriage years go, it probably was. But now I look back and think that was a hard year. We have grown to know each other so much more. Though we may face more difficult challenges, our relationship has grown easier.

I thank God for the blessed institution of marriage. Godly marriage is more wonderful, more joyful, more surprising than the world would have one believe. It is the best gift a person could hope for. It is worth waiting for.

Adam, I love you. I look forward to the next fifty years and more by your side.

Our First Refrigerator Art

2007-06-29T11:24:00.000-05:00

Luke made this masterpiece this morning in the Kid Zone at the gym while I was working out. I am so proud. It is the first time we have ever come home with something he has made. So, after showing Daddy, we proudly stuck it on the refrigerator.

Long Awaited House Pictures

2007-06-28T15:42:00.000-05:00

I found where Adam has been hiding the pictures of our house exterior, so here they are.

Front:

Back:

This sad little tree is no longer there. It tried so hard to come back, but alas it was not meant for our climate and we put it out of its misery.

I love having Adam home for the summer, but it does mean sharing computer time. So, I will have to update you on all the excitement and foibles of my fabulous Mommy Vacation '07 at another time. Also still to come - pictures of house interior.

Table Dancing

2007-06-16T11:42:00.000-05:00

I found this video on my You Tube account that I uploaded and then forgot to post. Luke loves American Idol. He claps for all the contestants and dances when he really likes them.

Mommy Vacation

2007-06-14T14:28:00.000-05:00

Tonight I leave my baby and my sweet husband to embark on my first ever Mommy Vacation. The hardest part of motherhood is that it is a 24/7 job 365 days of the year. For the most part, there are no breaks. No time to rest. So, my amazing Adam is giving me time to rest. I am going to Denver to stay with my old roomie Lisa.

Lisa knows how to take a vacation - sleep in, read by the pool, relax. We may check out some Denver sites. Mostly, I just plan to relax, spend good time in my Bible, read a novel or four, and rediscover Christin.

I must admit, though, I am having second thoughts about leaving my boys...

Today I Was THAT Lady

2007-06-05T23:15:00.000-05:00

It was one of those mornings where I knew I had to get Luke out of the house or pay for keeping him cooped up each excruciating minute after another. So after eating breakfast and getting both Luke and myself decently attired, we jumped in the car and headed to the mall.

Luke had two pairs of shoes-one pair for church and other dress up occasions, and a pair of sandals for playing. However, Luke is quite adept at removing his sandals. The plod of one shoe followed by the other hitting the car floor is now irrevocably registered in my brain. It has gotten so that I usually don’t even bother with putting his shoes on until we reach our destination. However, it is somewhat of a problem when I leave him in the nursery and he refuses to keep his shoes on. So, I was on a mission to find some cheap tennis for Luke to wear when playing. Plus, the mall has a new area for small children to run and play. An air conditioned park sounded like just the thing for this, the hottest day of the year so far.
Shoe shopping was a success. We quickly found some suitable tennis at the low, low price of $9.99.
I even found a pair of gorgeous wedges for myself. Also at the low, low price of only $9.99. I was feeling good. So, Luke and I headed for the play area.

Luke climbed up and slid down the slide once or twice, then headed for the gate. Not quite the entertainment I had hoped for him. So, I loaded him back up in the stroller and we traversed the mall. Luke and I shared a pretzel. I noted some shops to return to when I was alone and better able to make use of the dressing rooms. It didn’t take long to see all we could see, so we were soon back in the car.

Not ready to head home, I decided to make a trip up to my parents’ office. I was overdue for taking Luke to see the office ladies anyway. Pop has resigned himself to the fact that all work ceases in the front of the office when the grandkids visit. I think he’s proud to show the kids off. So, we made an appearance. The ladies oohed and ahhed over Luke’s new shoes and how well he is walking now. We played ball in the hallway. Luke charmed all. Then, Pop and Granny took us to lunch and work resumed as usual in the office.

Though it was past time to put Luke down for his nap, I decided to stop by Target on the way home. I had to resort to using Adam’s deodorant the night before, and well, I was anxious to be back to my feminine version. Luke was remarkably calm and cooperative sitting in the shopping cart as I raced to pick up what I needed. While sprinting down the aisle, I suddenly heard a familiar rumble and smelled an unpleasant odor. I hoped it was just gas and silently debated if it would make me a bad mother to wait until we arrived at home to check Luke’s diaper. My musings where interrupted by my phone. It was Adam calling to see how our day was going. He was out of town doing a presentation for another school district. I quickly explained what a wonderful day of adventure Luke and I were having, then let Luke talk, or grunt, to Daddy on the phone. We said our good-byes and headed for the front of the store. On a little high from talking to my sweet hubby, I had forgot all about my smelly dilemma. We checked out, I pushed the cart to join the rest, grabbed my purse and Target bag, and scooped up Luke. As his little heine came to rest on my arm, my breathe caught at a cold, wet squish.

Now, cold and wet is usually good on an 89 degree day. Cold and wet is refreshing in the form of lemonade. Cold and wet is revitalizing in the form of the yard sprinklers or neighborhood pool. Cold and wet is horrifying when it comes in the form of your toddler’s rear on your arm in the middle of Target.

I braced myself and looked down at the shopping cart seat. Fear became reality. I was gazing on a puddle of poop. It was at that moment that I realized I had chosen not to bring the diaper bag into the store. After all, we were just going to be a minute picking up one small item and heading home. Why is it that the only time I ever need the diaper bag is when I leave it in the car? My mind raced through options. I was somewhat incapacitated. I didn’t want to spread the cold wet any further by moving Luke from my arm.

My gaze then fell on a young, unsuspecting male. He appeared to be fully enjoying what looked like the second week of his new job during his summer break from high school. Our eyes met. He smiled, understanding by the look on my face that I was a customer in need of help. He quickly walked over to my aide. As he approached, I quickly explained the situation, “I’m so sorry, but this is really gross. My son’s diaper leaked in the cart, and I don’t have any wipes with me.” His eyes widened as I motioned to the seat and full understanding thudded into his brain. Graciously, he raised his hands in a calming motion and said he would take care of it. I apologized again and hurried to my car where I stripped Luke and changed his diaper in the front seat. I then strapped him, wearing only a diaper, white socks, and brand new white tennis shoes, into his car seat.

About halfway home, I turned to look at the little darling. To add one last level of excitement to my morning, somehow Luke had managed to pull his arms free from the seat harness. So, rather than the belts coming over his shoulders, they were going under his arms to the buckle between his legs. I just knew that this would be the day I was pulled over. The cop would look at my now cranky and in need of a nap child sitting naked in his car seat strapped in incorrectly and haul me off to jail.

But, we made it home safely, and I am just that lady who’s kid pooped in the Target shopping cart and left it for the high school boy on his summer job to clean up.

Finally a Profile Picture

2007-06-04T21:13:00.000-05:00

Wagon Ride

2007-06-02T22:00:00.001-05:00

Luke loves a good wagon ride. Cousin Amelia agrees. Granpa D (Adam's dad) made this wagon for Luke. The sides come off, and when Luke is ready for a ride, he climbs up in the wagon all by himself.

These two were too involved in the business of wagon riding to smile for the camera. This is a new facial expression for Luke. Your guess to its meaning is as good as mine. I'm thinking it's a "C'mon, Mom. Another picture? Can't you see I've got more important things to do?"

My Mesquites

2007-06-01T23:25:00.000-05:00

This is the view out my study window. It is my favorite tree - the one that twists and curves over the other and is so horizontal it requires a brace.

Growing up in West Texas, I took mesquite trees for granted. They make delicious barbecue, but mostly they are ugly little shrubs along the highway. They produce horribly long, sharp thorns that can pierce the sole of your tennis shoe, and bean pods cover the ground beneath.

Then I saw the mesquites in my yard. They are old and huge for mesquite trees. They wind and curve around each other. I fell in love with them. They are old enough that they no longer bear many thorns, and I have yet to see a bean pod, though they will probably be falling in a few months. I look at my trees and see the art of God in nature.

The boys in my family think they are great for climbing. I am sure that soon Luke will join in jumping from the low-lying trunks. But, I just like to gaze from my study window, ponder the graceful curves of hard trunks, and thank God for his jovial design.

What a Cutie!

2007-05-30T15:00:00.000-05:00

Quick Update

2007-05-10T12:37:00.000-05:00

I can't believe it has been so long since I last visited Blog World. Things on the Turner front have been quite busy. Here is the short version of what's been happening.

We closed on our new house on Monday, April 30th. However, the previous owners' house was not ready yet, so we technically leased our house to them until Thursday. We got the keys on Thursday and moved in on Saturday, Cinco de Mayo. Well, as it turns out, my entire family was scheduled to be out of town on business that day. So, a friend volunteered to help us move. Then, my dad's flight got messed up, so he was able to help us move Saturday morning until noon. Adam was convinced that they could make three trips to the new house from the storage unit from 8am-12pm. I thought he was crazy. As it turns out, they only needed to make two trips. However, the friend who was helping had to leave after unloading the first trailer load into our garage. This concerned me a little as the old sleeper sofa and the piano (the two heaviest things we own) were still sitting in the storage unit.

So, at 11am, Adam and my dad are headed back to the storage unit to load up the remainder of our stuff, and my mom and I headed back to her house to look for the furniture dollies in the garage to aid in moving the piano and couch. As I step around the front of my car, which was still sitting in mom's garage, I banged my knee on the the corner of my license plate. Not much pain, but oodles of blood. I call to mom. She brings the roll of paper towels. I realize that I am trying to stop the bleeding by pressing my very dirty finger on the wound. I switch to paper towels. I hobble in to the kitchen sink to clean up my leg. Mom brings hydrogen peroxide. I douse my wound. Still no pain. Mom calls Dad to inform him of our delay. Mom brings band aids, Neosporin, and clean socks. Bleeding has mostly stopped. I tightly adhere a band aid across my knee to hold wound together, change socks, and we head for the storage unit sans furniture dollies. When we arrive, both piano and couch are already on trailer.

The guys were able to finish unloading the trailer, except for the piano which is still sitting in the trailer in our driveway, by noon. We headed back to my parents house so Dad could shower and we could eat lunch. After lunch I trundled off to the Minor Emergency Clinic for a Tetanus shot, and after an hour returned to unpack boxes with a shot in the arm and three stitches in the knee. One more scar for the collection.

Meanwhile, Luke's eyes were oozing yellow gook. This has happened before, and so we knew he probably had another ear infection. Apparently, when one's sinuses and ears are really clogged, the gook starts coming out one's eyes. Of course, since it was late Saturday, he had to tough it out until Monday morning. Not to worry, he really didn't feel all that bad, his head was just really gross, leaking from the eyes, and by Monday morning, the ears. So, he is now on antibiotics once again, which lead to multiple diarrhea diapers a day. More yuck. Again I say, "Mike Rowe, you haven't got anything on me."

So, we have been busy unpacking all week. Since everything was in storage, everything has been infiltrated with bugs and dust. I have spent the last five days putting as much as possible through the dishwasher and handwashing the vast majority of my dishes. The washer and dryer have also been running nearly nonstop with sheets and towels and blankets. My hands are so dry that I can feel the roughness between my fingers. With all the washing, I haven't made it past the kitchen. Adam has set up the living room, and put our bed together.

We did also set up Luke's room so he could feel at home. He has a rough couple of days at first. He would get scared when I laid him down for his nap or bedtime. So, I would rock him to sleep and then lay him down. However, yesterday he went to his room all by himself to play with his toys and laid down as usual for his nap and bedtime. And, he has slept through the night the last two nights. Of course he could have been waking up the previous nights because his ears were hurting.

Well, that's the short version. At least as short as I know how to keep it. I will post some pictures of our wonderful new home as soon as I can.

I look forward to catching up with what's been going on in each of your worlds soon.

Friday Favorites - Shoes are Enough

2007-04-20T13:23:00.000-05:00

It's amazing how a little time changes things. When Luke first got his hard-soled shoes, he did not like them one bit. This morning, I left him in his diaper so that he could have some banana for breakfast without ruining his clothes for the day. Well, he wasn't ready for breakfast when he first got up, so I let him play for awhile. As I was fixing my morning cup of coffee, Luke walked into the kitchen, one sandal in each hand. He then bent over and tapped his feet with his shoes, his way of asking nicely for me to put his shoes on. This asking to wear shoes has become a common occurence. Of course, I think he likes his shoes so much because he associates shoe wearing with going outside. As soon as they were on, he walked to the back door and started reaching for the doorknob. Shoes mean going outside. Clothes? Who needs clothes for leaving the house?

Toddler!

2007-04-16T21:03:00.000-05:00

It is official. Luke is now a toddler! He is walking consistently and quite proud of himself.

Luke still enjoys playing in the dirt.

He has now gotten used to his hard-soled shoes. In fact, he likes them. He brings them to me to put on his feet.

New Shoes

2007-04-07T11:35:00.000-05:00

Now that Luke is walking more, it is time for him to start wearing hard soled shoes. (He is not quite a toddler yet. He still crawls half the time, but he is getting more and more confident on his feet.) So, Granny and I took him to get new shoes. He did not enjoy getting his feet measured. He did not enjoy the feel of the hard soles. Nevertheless, he is now the not-so-proud owner of hard soled sandals and hard soled church shoes.

On Wednesday, it suddenly occured to me that I should probably give Luke a chance to get used to his new shoes rather than putting them on him for the first time only to leave him in the nursery at church. So, we have been practicing. He is still not a fan. He tries to pull them off. He looks at me with those big blue eyes, questioning what in the world I have done to him now. His confidence in walking is shattered when wearing the new shoes. He is back to needing two hands held to go anywhere. I have decided that it is hard to be one year old.

I'm dreaming of a white...Easter?

2007-04-07T11:23:00.000-05:00

Once again, we are having crazy weather here in Texas, and my mom is irritated at the weather men. All the signs pointed to spring. The mesquite trees are budding (they say that the mesquite trees know when winter is over and only bud after the last freeze). The weather guys forcasted highs in the upper 60s for Easter weekend. It is currently 30 degrees out. But alas, we are once again having a white Easter. (About 10 years ago we got 9 feet of snow on Good Friday.) My parents spent last weekend and the early part of the week planting new flowers and pulling all the old ones out of the greenhouse. Dad spent yesterday hauling all those heavy pots back into the greenhouse and covering the new plants. We awoke this morning to sleet, our version of white. Mom is praying that her pretty new azaleas and geraniums are staying warm under their plastic blankets.

I looked up from my computer to discover that it is now snowing outside.

The azaleas in the front were not as fortunate as those in the back. They are weathering the storm uncovered.

Sleep and Teeth

2007-04-07T11:12:00.000-05:00

Luke and I have spent this week recovering from him being sick last week. He is finally back to sleeping through the night, which means I am finally back to sleeping through the night. Monday night Adam, Pop, Granny, and I were enjoying a remarkably peaceful dinner. I thought, Wow! Luke sure is being quiet and self-entertaining over there in his high chair. Then I looked up. He was so exhausted he had fallen asleep in his chair. We finished our meal and then put him to bed.

We have taken to calling Luke, "Snaggletooth." His smile is filling out with teeth, but some are more stubborn than others. The tooth count is at five. Two on bottom. Three on top, with a lovely hole between the two on his right and one on his left. What a cutie!

Palm Sunday

2007-04-01T13:27:00.000-05:00

As we enter Holy Week once again, I long to slow down, to reflect, to let the stunning importance of what God has done for me sink in deeply. With a sick one year old, a house full of nephews and niece, brother, sister, cousin, mom and dad, silence and solitude are rare. So, I am learning to meet God in the hubbub. I still hold that community is one of God's most precious gifts to us. What follows is an essay I wrote several years ago, but my mind still goes to it when I think of what Christ sacrificed for us.

A Look at the Cross

The image of the cross bombards us everyday...a necklace, a bumper sticker, five churches along my daily drive up Central Expressway in Dallas. Here in America, it is not only an emblem of the Christian faith, but also a shape our secular culture has adopted for its aesthetic value. To many Christians, it has become just another part of the church decor. If I am honest, I must admit that most of the time, when I see the cross, I don't think of anything. I, like many of my Christian brothers and sisters, have become calloused to it.

What about you? What image does the cross bring to your mind? Perhaps you do see the man hanging there. The Son of God, not only stripped of his divine glory, but of his very clothing as well. He hangs there, exposed in the air. He doesn't hang there by a harness. It is not some illusion presented to horrify us in a movie. The horror is real. The spikes are in his wrists, in his feet. The nails are actually engulfed by his flesh. Blood pours out. It is the sacrifice.

We in the western world are unfamiliar with the concept of sacrifice. We tend to think that whenever we give up a privilege it is a "sacrifice." I pat myself on the back when I give up the opportunity to go see the latest movie in order to spend time with a hurting friend who needs to talk, congratulating myself on "sacrificing" for my friend. Or I console myself by calling it a selfless sacrifice to allow my roommate to eat the last brownie. But this is not the meaning behind the biblical use of the term. The idea of sacrifice in the Bible involves blood, death, life lost on behalf of another.

Okay, so maybe this isn't a revolutionary idea for you. Perhaps when you think of sacrifice your mind automatically goes to the saving work of Christ on the cross. You may immediately associate Christ's dying on your behalf whenever the term comes up. So, my next question to you is, has it become an abstract theological consideration? Do you find yourself contemplating the work of Christ only in terms of what it has done for you? Or do you find yourself wondering what took place for Him? What was it like for Him to be the sacrificial lamb?

The Old Testament book of Leviticus gives us a picture of what took place when an animal was offered as a sacrifice. Picture the process with me. Imagine you are living in Israel during the time of David. The time has come to take your offering to the temple to make atonement. You carefully walk through your herd, searching for the perfect lamb, the lamb without blemish.

After choosing the best lamb from your flock, you begin the journey to the temple. Each day you spend walking to Jerusalem, your perfect lamb in tow, you ponder the reason for your journey. The constant bleating is an ever-present reminder. The burden of your guilt weighs heavily upon you. Once again you have failed, fallen short of God's standard and you know that God is a God of justice and wrath (Psalm 7:11). You know that God is a God who does not leave the guilty unpunished (Exodus 34:7). And you know that the punishment for your guilt is death. A panic sweeps over you. The reality and gravity of your guilt against God sinks in. Then it quickly fades as the bleating of a sheep fills your ears. You remember that God has given you a way out. He will accept the life of this animal in the place of your life. Relief floods over you, as well as gratitude towards God, and perhaps even a little love and pity for the animal accompanying you.

Your time of contemplation and reflection continues as you wait at the temple for your turn to present your lamb to the priest for sacrifice. When your time finally arrives, you stand before the priest with your lamb, the one you meticulously chose, the one who accompanied you on the long journey and stood at your side in the temple courtyard. You lay your hand on its head as the law commands, showing that this guiltless animal now bears your own guilt. Its head is warm with life. It continues its bleating, now more frantically. With your hand on its head, you raise your knife to its neck and quickly make the stroke which brings your atonement.

Suddenly, there is an eerie quiet. The bleating has ceased. A stream of deep red pours forth from the animal's neck. Your hand remains on the head which is now deathly still and without movement. You watch as the spark of life fades from its big black eyes until they stare blankly ahead. Blood continues to flow from the neck of the one who bore your judgment. The iron smell of blood fills the air around you. The flow slows to a drip, but the payment is not yet complete. The blood and the gore are just beginning.

The priest takes the blood and sprinkles it against all sides of the altar. Then you must cut the carcass into pieces. Warm, sticky blood covers your hands and creeps up your arms, splattering against your clothing as you do your brutal task. You wash the heart, the stomach, the kidneys, and all the other inner organs with water. Then you cleanse the legs with water. The priest then takes each of the body parts to the fire burning on the altar. An aroma pleasing to the Lord rises through the air (Leviticus 1:10-13). The smoke blows in your face and the smell of burnt flesh singes your nose.

As the last of the offering succumbs to the flame, you turn to leave, passing by the bloody mess your sin has made on the ground. As you walk away from the temple, you take note of the absence of the tug at the end of the rope in your hand. You also breath deeply and freely, knowing your sin has been atoned for once again. This is a familiar feeling because this is not the first time you have made this journey. And you know it will not be the last.

Now, take another look at the cross. What do you see? From this angle, the cross is a sacrificial altar, covered in blood. The man on it, the Son of God, is the pure and spotless lamb dying as your substitute. His hand reaches out to your head, showing His voluntary acceptance of your judgment, of your punishment, of your death.

His blood courses over his body. The warm, sticky substance ebbing from the body of the God-man flows down to cover you. Then, as the deep red of His blood meets with the deep black of your sin, something amazing happens. Your blackness is transformed to dazzling white. Rather than being covered with a smelly, sticky substance, you are washed clean by the blood of the lamb. It is a deep clean. A clean that reaches to your bones and through your soul.

Paul tells us in 1 Corinthians that even though we were idolaters, adulterers, thieves, drunkards, greedy, or liars, we have been washed clean and justified in Christ (1 Corinthians 6:9-11). Our blackest black is declared pure white by the red blood of the lamb. There is more. It goes far deeper than the outward actions that are visible to all. The blood of Christ goes above and beyond what the blood of an animal could do and washes even our conscience clean (Hebrews 9:13-14).

The cross is a cleansing shower, cleaning the deepest recesses of your being. As you walk away from the cleansing shower, you pass by the bloody mess on the cross caused by your sin. You have been thoroughly purified and atoned for. This is a new, refreshing feeling. You know that the process, the sacrifice, will not have to be repeated. The atonement is complete. The blood of the Lamb of God has made you permanently clean.

Please Keep Praying

2007-03-31T17:18:00.000-05:00

Thank you for praying for Thursday. I didn't get to meet with the girl after all for reasons completely out of my hands. So, I am thinking it wasn't God's timing for me to meet with her. Please keep praying, though. She will be induced on Tuesday. I am still hoping to get a chance to meet with her and minister to her. This will probably be an ongoing thing.

Request for Prayer

2007-03-27T14:49:00.000-05:00

I am meeting and talking with a young girl this Thursday. She is 17 and pregnant. She has already made the brave decision to carry the child to term. The baby girl will be born any day now. My soul has been in torment about her situation since I heard about her at church last Sunday. Please pray that God will give me wisdom. That he will prompt my speech. That I will encourage her in the path God wants her to take. Please pray that this young girl will have the courage to make the hard decisions that come with being a mom. Please pray for the life and soul of this precious baby girl.

Spring Swing

2007-03-22T15:34:00.000-05:00

The weather has been gorgeous here. So, last night, Adam, Luke, my parents, and I went to enjoy the lovely evening in the backyard. We sat on the porch, Adam and I swinging on the porch swing, talking and trying to keep Luke from eating fistfulls of dirt, acorns, or rocks. I looked up, and there, blowing gently in the breeze, was the tire swing. My nephews were not here to put it to use. It called to me.

I swang forwards and backwards, but the best is to swing around in a big circle.

The old oak tree has just started to put on new leaves. The view from the swing is beautiful.
I soon talked Adam into giving it a try.
After much coersion, I got my dad on the swing, too.
He loved it.

Mom didn't take much convincing after Dad gave it a try. She was dying to get on from the beginning. She is much more of a free spirit than she lets on.
Luke enjoyed exploring. And of course, eating dirt, acorns, and rocks. (According to my mom, he gets the fascination with eating dirt from me.)

Spring Break

2007-03-18T17:21:00.000-05:00

I must apologize for neglecting my blogging duties. Kirsten, I'm still here!

This week has been Spring Break for us. One of the perks of being married to a teacher is having my husband home during Spring Break. So, I have been spending time with family rather than at the computer.

We have had an eventful week. Here's what's been happening...

Luke's First Trip to the Zoo (Saturday, March 10th)

2007-03-18T16:18:00.000-05:00

The sun was out, so we were too. I think Mommy and Daddy enjoyed the zoo as much as Luke.

Luke was especially fascinated by the flamingos and ducks. He must be his Grandpa D's boy.

Monkeys watching monkeys.

Luke liked the jaguar.

In case you are wondering, that bison is trying to get the animal food we threw to it. You can buy special food to feed the animals at our zoo. I don't know if this is common at zoos or not. When I was little, they sold animal crackers that you could eat or share with the animals. We usually ended up eating the majority of them ourselves. Now, it is just for the animals.

One of my favorite parts of our zoo is the bridge over the giraffes. Usually, the giraffes are right up under you, so you can feed them. Their long, purple tongues are quite nimble in picking up the smallest crumb. Unfortunately, we went pretty late in the day, and I think the giraffes had already had their fill of crackers.

At this point, Luke was more interested in grabbing crackers for himself than looking at the elephants. We were glad to have brought along some Luke food, too.

Luke meets his first secretary bird.

Luke and Daddy liked the snakes. We had to remind Luke not to "tap on the glass," but he has difficulties with this at home, too.

We love the zoo!

Big News (Monday and Tuesday, March 12th-13th)

2007-03-18T15:53:00.000-05:00

I thought about leaving this one for last. It is the most exciting part of our week. But, then I thought I would just tell everything in order.

Are you ready for it?

On Monday, Adam and I BOUGHT A HOUSE!!! We are so excited! Can you tell?

God has been so good to us in this whole thing. When we started actually thinking about where we wanted to live, I decided I wanted to live on S Drive. Now, S Drive is in my parents' neighborhood, and pretty much out of our price range. Also, as we started thinking about what we wanted in a house, I thought I would like to have a study, something else I knew we could not afford in a house. We began to look at the houses in the neighborhoods close to my parents that were closer to our price range. However, we soon became discouraged with them. Most of them were built in the 50s, the looked run down, and in the nicer ones, the bathrooms were unbearably small. So, we came to the conclusion that we are newer house people and needed to look at houses built more recently than the 1950s.

We looked around in the neighborhood where I grew up, a subdivision built in the 80s. Unfortunately, not much is for sale there. We were able to see one house there, but it didn't fit us. We also checked out the new construction in town. The houses there were significantly smaller and only a tiny bit less expensive than the houses we were looking at close to my parents.

In all this looking, a nice little house on S Drive had come for sale. We drove past it, week after week, noticing the sale sign remained. Then, on Sunday the 4th, the house was open. Well, Luke was ill that day, and the rest of my family had gone to my grandmother's for the day. So, I told Adam, "I will go look at the house while you stay home with Luke. If it is something special, then you can go when I get back while I keep Luke at home."

I was shocked at what I found. This house, built in the 50s, is well kept and well updated - new carpet, new tile, new thermopane windows (something Kirsten can appreciate), new gas line, new electric line. The bathrooms are big enough for two people to stand in without touching each other or infringing upon personal space. Both back and front yards are beautifully manicured in such a way that requires little upkeep (I am not a yard person), and there are plenty of big, old, mesquite trees in both yards. (I have learned that you have to be a West Texas native to truly appreciate mesquite trees.) And, to top it all off, as I round the corner of the kitchen, I came across a comfortable little study.

When I got home, I wouldn't tell Adam anything other than he needed to go check it out himself. He came back impressed as well. So, we sat on it for a week, praying about whether or not this was the house God has for us. I wanted to jump on it and make an offer right away, but I knew that if this was God's house for us, then he wasn't going to let someone else buy it. And, if it sold while we were praying about it, then it wasn't meant for us.

So after a week of growing excitement through prayer, we went to the bank on Monday the 12th to apply for a loan. We were approved, through the grace of God. We then headed to the realtor and made our bid. Monday night, we came to an agreed price with the seller. We spent Tuesday going back and forth between the bank and the realtor to continue moving through the paperwork. We will be able to move in at the end of April, so long as everything else checks out. We meet with the inspector on Tuesday.

We are so excited!

Ear Tubes (Wednesday, March 14th)

2007-03-18T15:45:00.000-05:00

We woke up early on Wednesday to take Luke to get his ear tubes. It ended up being a mostly easy experience. They take the kids in order of age, so Luke was number two that day, which meant we didn't have to wait long. Luke ended up having the same anesthesiologist as I had when my spleen was removed. He didn't recognize me. I don't blame him. I had my hair done, makeup on, and my contacts in. The last time he saw me, I was in one of those lovely blue hair caps, no makeup, and glasses on.

Less than fifteen minutes after they took Luke from us, he was back in our arms. It was hard to watch him wake up from the anesthesia. He cried a lot. Then again, I tend to cry when coming out of it myself. Once he finally did wake up completely, we had a good day. I was expecting a hard day, but he was pretty much back to himself after his afternoon nap.

Adam and I had cleared the day so that we could focus on Luke. So, as Luke napped, we just rested and recouped from the previous days' stress and excursions.

Playing in the Park (Thursday, March 15th)

2007-03-18T15:11:00.000-05:00

Thursday was a beautiful day, so we took Luke to the park. This was the first time he has been to the park to play. Pop and Granny's backyard is almost like a private park, so we spend a lot of time outside there.

At the park, Luke went down the slide with Mommy. (I know, my sunglasses are goofy.)

Luke played in the swing.

Luke went down the slide with Daddy.

Luke did not like going down the slide by himself.

We watched the prairie dogs, one of West Texas' native creatures.

If you look hard, you may be able to spot one in the picture below. If you are really interested in what prairie dogs look like, let me know and I will post a picture of one.

Luke played in the grass.

Luke threw his ball in the grass.

But, mostly, Luke just wanted to play in the dirt.

Practicing Walking (Thursday, March 15th)

2007-03-18T15:00:00.000-05:00

After getting home from the park, we spent some time practicing walking with Luke. He is getting so close. Often now, he will let go of whatever he is holding onto (the ottoman, the table, the couch) and take off for a few steps before going back to his hands and knees. Any day now we are going to have a toddler.

Big Date in Dallas (Friday and Saturday, March 16th-17th)

2007-03-18T14:36:00.000-05:00

We ended our Spring Break with a wonderful date night in Dallas. Adam had been planning this one for a little while. He had suggested to several family members that they give me gift cards to III Forks, one of my favorite restaurants in Dallas, for my birthday. This is the type of restaurant that is so fancy and expensive, we could only go if given gift cards. Adam had also arranged for Grandpa D and Grandma D to keep Luke while we stayed in a hotel. They were thrilled with the opportunity.

So, on Friday, we packed up and headed for Dallas. We left Luke with Grandma D and went to check in at our hotel. It was very nice. We changed into our nice clothes and headed to III Forks. The meal was incredible. We both enjoyed a scrumptious Filet Mignon. As Adam likes to say, the steak there is so tender, you can cut it with a fork. Everything was delicious, from the salad to the garlic mashed potatoes to the rosemary corn. To top it off, we indulged in the Chocolate Ganache Cake.

The last time we had been to III Forks, I was about 8 1/2 months pregnant. Adam had taken me for my birthday last year. At the end of our meal, we tried the Chocolate Ganache Cake. I cannot tell you how amazing this cake is. Every bite was heaven. However, we were both already full when we ordered the cake, so we were unable to finish it. We left just a little on the plate. The waitress asked if we would like her to box it up for us. I said no thanks, thinking that there really wasn't enough left to make it worth taking home. Well, for at least the next two weeks (and this is no exaggeration), my very first thought upon waking up in the morning each and every day was, "Oh, I wish we had brought that cake home." So, a year later, I finally got to have more of that cake. And, it was just as good as I had remembered.

Adam and I had a wonderful time, dining slowly together. We enjoyed uninterrupted conversation together on interesting, thought provoking subjects. It was lovely. My husband is so wonderful and so sweet to pamper me and treat me like a queen.

The next day, we shopped for Luke's final birthday present - a forward facing car seat. We then had lunch together at one of the other, more every day Dallas restaurants that we don't have at home. That probably sounds funny. We don't eat out every day, but we did eat out a lot when we lived in the Dallas area. It is one of those strange things about the Dallas culture. I once heard that Dallas is at the top for most restaurants per capita.

Anyway, we then headed down to Grandpa D's house to pick up Luke. Adam and his dad spent 30-45 minutes installing the new car seat, and then we loaded up and headed home.

As for the new car seat, Luke likes it. He is higher up and can see out the windows. He was so engrossed in the passing scenery, that he would throw whatever toy I gave him on the floor. The only problem with a forward facing car seat, is that it sits up much more than the rear facing ones. Therefore, one's head fall's to one's chest when asleep.

Oh! He is getting to be such a big boy!

Happy Birthday!

2007-03-07T17:33:00.000-06:00

Today is historic! It is the first time Luke and I get to share a birthday. Today, March 7, 2007, Luke turns 1 year old and I turn 29 years old.

Luke's First Year: A Story in Pictures Except the Parts You Wouldn't Want to See Anyway

2007-03-07T17:30:00.000-06:00

In May 2005, I graduated with my Masters from Dallas Theological Seminary. Finally freed from school and married for nearly one whole year, my thoughts began to turn towards babies. Adam's thoughts were there, too. We began to discuss and pray over whether or not it was time to start a family. We came to the conclusion that we might as well start our family, after all we couldn't afford to travel like we wanted, and maybe by the time the kids are grown, we would have money to see the world. Of course, that meant we couldn't really afford babies, but hey, we'd make do, and God would take care of it. So, we left it in God's hands, knowing that he is the creator of each soul and would give us a child in his perfect timing.

Now, I have to admit, that in my mind, getting pregnant was supposed to take time. Most couples I know have struggled with getting pregnant for months or years. So, I was a little unprepared when we were pregnant in June. The next 9 months were not easy. Let it suffice to say that at 20 weeks my weight was the same as before I was pregnant. Not good. I then learned the joys of Reglan, which I took before each meal and before bedtime. This helped. I then proceeded to become very large.

March 5th - Two days before Luke was born - Whoa, baby! Look at the size of that belly!

On Thursday, March 2nd, my mother accompanied me to my weekly doctor's appointment. Dr. Hassan walked in the room, measured my belly, and gasped, "This child is big! We gotta get him out!" I sat there thinking, Did I not just see you last week? I know we haven't grown that much in a week! She then proceeded to ask if I was okay with inducing on Tuesday. "Yes! Please get this child out of me!" Walking down the hall, smiling ear to ear, I suddenly realized, Tuesday is March 7th, my birthday. Oh well! Who cares! Get this baby out of me!

We arrived at the hospital at 10pm on Monday night to get checked into my room and start some drugs that would ease labor the following day. We started the pitocin drip at 7am on Tuesday, along with a healthy dose of Stadol, which pretty much just knocked me out. This was nice as I had gotten very little sleep during the night. There was a woman down the hall giving birth. She wasn't near as bad as her 2 or 3 year old who was running up and down the hall screaming.

I woke up after a couple hours and asked the nurse, "When can I have my epidural?"

"Whenever you want it."

"How about now?" I salute all you women who are brave enough to go through labor and delivery without drugs. Me, I thank God for the science of pain killers.

The anesthesiologist, Dr. Montague, soon arrived with his blessed bag o' meds. I liked him as soon as I heard his name. How can you not like someone named Montague? After shooing Adam to the other side of the bed to hold my hand instead of watching the procedure, Dr. Montague made all my pain go away. On his way out the door, he told me to give him a call if I needed a stronger dose. After all, his moto is, "No pain... no pain." What a lovely man.

I slept the blissfull sleep of the drugged.

Around 4pm, the nurse informed me that I was at a 10 and ready to go. Yea! They got me into position - a very strange experience as my legs were so numb I felt they didn't belong to me - and I gave a big push.

"Excellent," the nurse said. "It is so good to have a mom who pushes good. This baby will be out in no time."

I relaxed back against the pillow. "Thanks," I smiled. "I've had lots of practice with all the constipation."

The nurse left to get my doctor. She returned alone. Not good. "I'm sorry, but Dr. Hassan has been pulled into an emergency c-section. We'll have to wait. I'll get Dr. Montague to give you a stronger dose through your epidural so you can wait more comfortably."

At 4:45p we started pushing again. Once again, I was told how great a pusher I am. This was not encouraging after an hour of "pushing great." If I was such the great pusher, why wasn't this baby coming out? The doctor soon discovered that he was face up, and stuck on my pelvic bone. Another 30 minutes of pushing and I was exhausted and crying like a baby.

At one point, as I am sobbing, "I can't do this! I can't do this!" (not very brave, I know), Dr. Hassan says, "Well, we can push him back up and do a c-section."

I thought, Are you crazy? If we were going to do a c-section we should have done it two hours ago, before all the pushing. I said, "No."

We (I mean me. Really, who's doing the work here?) continue pushing, with very little progress. Finally Dr. Hassan reluctantly says, "His head is already too torn up to use the vacuum. I am afraid it would tear his head up more. We can try the forcepts, but they are harder on mom."

"I don't care! Get the forcepts! Get him out!"

After a couple pushes with Dr. Hassan helping with the forcepts, Luke's head finally pops out. Now, this is a very exciting moment, because it happens so quickly that Dr. Hassan, who had knee surgery about a month prior, goes flying back onto the tray of intruments and then to the floor. Every eye in the room follows, with gasps, as she tumbles and pops back up to finish the job. Luke wasn't going anywhere without her.

Then it gets a little scary. I hear her say the cord is wrapped around Luke's neck, and it is very short. Luke had shown no signs of distress throughout the entire labor and two and a half hours of pushing, but he is a little blue. I hear the nurse say, "Come on, baby, breathe," as she rubs him. After what felt like an eternity, blessed screams come from my not so tiny boy.

At this point, I get another dose of Stadol for reasons you probably don't want to hear. I am sure I have already shared more details than some wanted to know. So, at this point on, everything is a fuzzy haze as anxious family members come in one or two at a time to say "hi." At one point, I tell my mom, "I don't know what's real and what I'm dreaming."

There is no doubt in my mind that God's hand was on both Luke and me. It is only through his grace that we both came through relatively unscathed and healthy.

March 7, 2006 - Luke is born at 7:18pm. He weights in at 9lbs 3oz and is 21 inches long.

March 8th - Daddy changes his first diaper.

March 8th - Sweet kiss.

March 8th - Daddy's Boy

March 9th - Getting ready to go home

March 9th - First car ride

On the way home from the hospital, Mommy and Daddy heard a new sound and smelled a new smell. We looked at each other, "Was that you?"

"No."

Luke wasted no time in getting us well acquainted with dirty diapers. If you look closely at the picture, you can tell by the look on his face that he is preparing a surprise for us.

March 9th - First day at home

March 10th - Like many babies, Luke had to spend a few days sunbathing due to jaundice. Adam's dad built this cradle. Adam and his sisters slept in it when they were babies.

Luke showed us early on that he is his daddy's son.

March 10th - Donald Trump Faces

March 11th - The picture in the picture is Daddy as a baby. Aunt Donna brought the picture and the pillow case in the picture to see just how much Luke looks like his daddy.

May 28th - I looked up from cooking in the kitchen and there they were, sitting together, staring in the same direction with the same look on their faces.

May 29th - Cool Dudes in Sunglasses

Have you ever seen a cuter Easter Bunny?

May 10th - Luke is 2 months old and finally gets his first real bath. He is not amused. It took two months to get in the bathtub because Luke does not like change and would not give up his umbilical cord. At his two month check up, his doctor finally just cut it off, leaving what I think is a somewhat interesting belly button.

May 27th - Luke sees himself in the mirror for the first time. He is quite amused.

May 31st - Luke finally enjoys bathtime. I think it is because Daddy is the one bathing him. Daddy makes everything fun.

June 12th - I love this picture. Luke is 3 months old here. What a face!

June 13th - Here's another one I just can't resist sharing. I love that smile!

June 14th - What a handsome boy! Luke is patiently sitting on Mommy's bed while she busily packs for the big move to Abilene. Well, he say patiently for a minute or two.

June 17th - After making it to Abilene, Daddy puts Luke's saucer together for the first time. Luke loves it. He can have a little independence in it.

July 8th - Luke is 4 months old and trying his first spoonfeeding. He is a fan of rice cereal, but learning to eat from a spoon is tricky.

July 20th - Luke and Daddy try out the new baby carrier as they pack for our trip to Colorado. Once again, like fathre, like son. They are admiring themselves in the mirror.

July 22nd - On our way, we stop at the Great Sand Dunes to play. Here I sit with Cynthia, my sister-in-law.

July 22nd - Adam enjoying the Sand Dunes. Adam hiked nearly to the top of the Dunes. Luke was off playing with Pop, Granny, and Cousin Amelia at the entrance to the Dunes. They weren't interested in hiking across the sand.

July 27th - Here we sit by the campfire in Colorado. This was Luke's first big family vacation. We stayed in a cabin, way up in the mountains. The closest thing to civilization was a tiny little town called Creed, an hour down the mountain via scary, windy, narrow dirt road. It was beautiful. We went horseback riding and four wheeling (I nearly fell off the mountain - a story for another time). Adam learned to fly-fish with my dad, brather, and cousin. We even got to join up wiht Adam's family who were vacationing in Silverton for the week.

July 25th - Adam, Grandpa D, and Grandma D stroll through the streets of Silverton carrying Luke, Will, and Sam.

July 25th - First Bar Experience. Luke, Will, Sam, and Amelia enjoy a nice bottle of milk at a Silverton pub with Adam, Grandpa D, Amy, and Grandma D. (Granny and I are there, too.)

July 26th - Adam, Brian, Micah, Granny, Luke, Noah, Amelia, and Pop watch as Cynthia, Jeff, and I get on our horses.

July 26th - Jeff (my brother), Cynthia (Jeff's wife), Brian (my cousin), Me, and Adam enjoyed the scenary and the personalities of our horses. It was amazing how we were paired up with horses that matched our personalities. You can see both Brian and his horse like to be the center of attention.

July 28th - Luke and Daddy have fun on the cabin porch. The table is covered in walnuts because we enjoyed watching the chipmunks.

July 28th - My dad was determined for Adam to catch a fish. So, on our last day, we wathed as Adam caught a big one.

August 4th - Luke is nearly 5 months old, and he has his first taste of peas. He is not a fan.

August 22nd - Luke loves his bouncy seat. He is quite the jumper..

August 23rd - Luke is a pro at sitting all by himself. Mommy is so proud and happy that he is learning to play by himself.

August 25th - Luke helps Daddy grill hamburgers. Also helping are Cousin Micah (left) and Cousin Noah (right). Daddy loves hamburgers.

September 11th - Luke is 6 months old. Daddy spoonfeeds Luke for the first time. What a mess! Perhaps he should have started with something less colorful, like applesauce.

Daddy's way of cleaning up is to stick Luke in the sink and hose him off. Luke is still a mess, but at least now it is just water.

September 13th - Luke loves playing outside with the big boys. He also loves balls of any shape or size.

October 3rd - Luke decides it is more fun to eat when feet are involved. After fighting a losing battle, Mommy gives up trying to keep the feet down and runs to get the camera.
Luke soon discovers that two feet are better than one.

October 3rd - Granny gives Luke his first popsicle. Yum. Luke likes popsicles.

October 15th - Luke is 7 months old. Uncle Brian brings home a chair that is just Luke's size. Luke loves it. This is the first time Luke poses for the camera. We laughed as he made lots of funny faces.

October 17th - Luke loves the vacuum. He and Cousin Amelia get in close to investigate after Daddy turns it off. Luke will sit and watch the vacuum go back and forth, back and forth, back and forth...

October 21st - Luke and Daddy love playing outside together. Mommy loves her boys.

October 31st - Luke is the cutest little egg in town!
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall...
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall!

November 6th - The day before Luke turns 8 months. he crawls for the first time.

November 11th - We return to Dallas for a family wedding. We got to stay with Kelly and Jonathan. Luke had fun playing at Kelly's house. She has lots of fun cat toys...
magazines to shred...
and the coffee table is the perfect height for pulling up.

While in Dallas, we also got to spend some time with Adam's family. Luke loves his Aunt Annie. She is super fun to play with.

Grandpa D reads to a captive audience. (Luke adn Cousin Sam)

Luke love his Grandma D and Grandpa D.

Luke helps Daddy and Grandpa D in the woodshop.
Watch out Grandpa D. It looks like you have a helper.

Motorcycle Dude!

We also got to visit Aunt Joan and Uncle Tim on our trip. Ride 'em, Cowboy!

November 12th - Luke loves his Aunt Joan and Uncle Tim.

November 16th - Grandpa D made Luke his very own set of wooden blocks. Luke thinks they are very tasty.

November 18th - We get to visit Great Grandma Carr (my dad's mom). We always have so much fun at her farm.

November 20th - Luke's first time behind the wheel. Driver's liscense? I don't need no stinkin' driver's liscense!

November 21st - We're back in Dallas for a visit. Luke enjoys playing with twin cousins Sam (right) and Will (center). Grandpa D and Grandma D's house is so fun.

November 22nd - When Pop comes home, he likes to take the babies for a walk outside. Luke and Amelia love it. Here they are checking on things in the greenhouse.

November 23rd - Luke's first Thanksgiving. It is such a beautiful day. We have fun playing in the backyard. Micah took Amelia and Luke for a ride.

Luke plays football with the big boys.

Luke zerberts Daddy's cheek.

Luke loves to fly. Mommy doesn't like to watch, but it is hard to turn away from the smile and giggle.

November 24th - Luke takes his first bike ride. He enjoys the ride, but...
he's not so sure about the seat.

December 1st - Luke is quite the crawling pro. Watch out!
He's fast!

Here I must pause to include a small caveat on the ways babies sleep, and the way I as a first time mother dealt with my sleeping baby. There is nothing more precious to gaze at than a sleeping baby. Just yesterday, I quietly mooned over the face of my sleeping child. When we brought Luke home from the hospital, we could hardly put him down. I would hold him throughout most of the day as he slept against my chest. It was heavenly. On the rare occasion when I would lay him in his cradle to sleep, I was sure to place him on his back or side as the pediatrician had instructed, or hounded really, every time we saw her. This is very important for infants, according to studies on SIDS. As a new mom, who wasn't quite sure her baby could continue breathing if she wasn't holding him or watching him, I diligently checked every few minutes to make sure his tiny chest continued moving up and down. Even during the night, I would wake up and check on him periodically. The ironic part is that most babies tend to sleep better on their belly. As soon as Luke learned to roll over, he would roll to his belly to sleep. This terrified me. For the for the first week or so, I would actually check to see if he had rolled to his belly and roll him back to his back. He, of course, would just roll back to his belly a few minutes after I had gone. This continued night after night until I heard God speak in compassion to my heart, "This is my child. I will sustain him through the night."

Then, when Luke started crawling, things got funny. He began to sleep in the funniest positions, most involving his rear raised in the air:

November 28th - Does that look comfortable to you?

December 3rd - He is actually laying on his foot. I can't imagine getting in this position on purpose.

December 9th - Luke crawls out of his pants before falling asleep.

December 24th - Luke is sleeping with his foot sticking out of the crib.

November 30th - At this point, we were still sharing a room with Luke. I got to wake up most mornings to the smiles and coos of my little guy. He likes to stand in the middle of his mobile.

December 12th - Luke is 9 months old. We celebrate Christmas at Aunt Joan's house. Sam, Will, and Luke have a ball playing together.

December 18th - It is Luke's first experience in opening presents. He is very fascinated with the paper.

December 22nd - We celebrate Christmas in Abilene with the Carr family. What a bunch! Luke sits with Carr cousins Micah, Noah, and Amelia (left to right).

Daddy tries to help Luke figure out this opening presents thing.

What a cutie! Luke is quite the charmer in his Christmas outfit.

December 25th - We celebrate Christmas in Dallas with the Turner family. Grandpa D made Luke a wagon. Luke loves the wagon, but is anxious to get the hat off his head.

Christmas is exhausting.

December 27th - Luke plays with Grandpa D at his office before we head back home.

January 10th - Luke is 10 months old. He practices walking with his new car. Thanks Grandpa D and Grandma D!

January 20th - We learn that when one has dirty diapers 4-6 times a day that leak onto one's pants, one cannot be picky about one's clothes.

January 30th - Luke enjoys his Elmo table. Thanks, Aunt Donna!

February 11th - Luke is 11 months old!

February 16th - Luke explores the backyard on his own.

It won't be long before Luke is walking.

It has been an incredibly short year. I can't believe my baby is now one year old. God has been so good to us. Luke has already brought light into our family. I pray that he will continue to fulfill his name and bring light into the world for the Lord.

Luke's First Birthday Party

2007-03-06T22:54:00.000-06:00

We celebrated Luke's first birthday on Saturday, March 3rd. We were so blessed to have so many family and friends come to celebrate with us. Here are some pictures from our fun day.

Adam's sister Annie helped me decorate the cake. She did such a fantastic job. Thank you, Annie! The chocolate rose cake was for my birthday cake.

After enjoying hamburgers and hot dogs, we let Luke open his presents. He did better than at Christmas, but he still found the paper very exciting. He also had lots of cousins who were anxious to help him break in the new toys.

Daddy helped Luke blow out his candle.

Luke was not shy about digging into his cake.

Most of the cake ended up in his lap, but that didn't stop him from getting all the crumbs he could into his mouth.

Luke's cousin Micah enjoyed his piece of cake.

Grandpa D (Adam's dad) and Luke's cousin Sam enjoy the greenhouse. Sam is not quite sure what to do about his fogged up glasses.

All the excitement has worn Luke out. He took a nice nap with Aunt Joan on the swing.

Micah shows Will (Luke's cousin) how to drive the jeep. Daniel (friend) waits anxiously for his turn. The jeep was quite a hit among the kids. Meanwhile, the big boys tossed the football in the yard.

Annie, Grandpa D, Brian (my cousin), Alex (Adam's cousin), and Cynthia (my sis-in-law)

Adam with little sister Annie (left) and big sister Amy (right)

Next to me and following counter clockwise is Matt (Adam's cousin), Joan (Adam's aunt), Donna (Adam's aunt) with Luke, Annie, and Amy

Top: Alex, Adam, Matt. Bottom: Amy, Heather, Annie. What a great shot of Adam, his sisters, and cousins.

Thanks to all her were able to come. It was a drive for Adam's family to join us, but we loved seeing everyone and sharing Luke's special day with those who love him so much.

Dance Fever

2007-02-28T12:29:00.000-06:00

Luke has started dancing to the music. So, proud mommy had to share it with you. Forgive the bumpiness of the video. I was laughing. And, please pay no attention to the horrible, scratchy voice you hear coming from behind the camera. I lost my voice for a couple days due to a dust storm that blew through last weekend. Also, in fear of infringing upon copyright issues, the music you hear is Adam singing with Luke's Elmo table. Luke loves the table. It is one of those stand and play and learn type things. All his cousins love it too. Hopefully, the free advertisement will appease any offense.

Learning to Walk

2007-02-24T19:12:00.000-06:00

Luke isn't walking yet, but he is getting close. He can stand up all by himself until he realizes he's doing it. Then he very slowly and very controlledly sits down. Here he takes a few steps on his own. It's not spectacular, but I am proud.

Luke Plays Ball

2007-02-23T11:57:00.000-06:00

Luke's favorite activity is playing with balls. He got a big kick out of bouncing the ball with Pop (my dad). I love that laugh!

Rebecca, thanks for the "how to."

Fear

2007-02-22T17:10:00.000-06:00

Frank Herbert uses “Fear is the mind killer,” as one of the main motifs in his Dune series. He is right. Fear is the mind killer. Fear is also the heart witherer, the soul cager, and the purpose quencher.

Fear is my captor.

Emotions are funny things. I believe emotions are one of God’s greatest gifts to us. They make life interesting. They make life livable. They are dangerous. Emotion can be the thing that most easily distracts us from God. Emotion effortlessly causes us to sin.

Emotions in and of themselves are not wrong. I do not believe we can control what emotion bubbles up from within. However, we can control what we do with the emotion that comes. Sin lurks in the moment we decide what to do with the emotion. It is not wrong for anger to bubble up at my husband. I sin when I act on that anger, when I refuse to forgive, when I make him pay. It is not a sin to feel fear. I sin when I sit wallowing in worry rather than trusting God. When I allow my fear to control me, rather than me controlling the fear, I am wrong.

I am wrong in this area often.

It is strange. I remember living without constant fear. I think fear started being an issue for me in college when I took a self-defense class. Ironic, I know. A class that should have empowered me, actually caused me to start recognizing all the dangers around me. I learned all the right moves in class. I could even perform them well on the other girls in class. Then I tried them on my boyfriend at the time. Nothing seemed to work.

I think TV also played a role in increasing my fear. For years I relished crime dramas. In high school I would stay up to watch Law & Order, the original version. I now severely limit my viewing of crime TV and the news. The fear these things birth in me is so great that I currently am unable to be at home alone when a repair man comes. This is sad.

God does not want us to live in fear.

So then, brothers and sisters, we are under obligation, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh (for if you live according to the flesh, you will die), but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body you will live. For all who are led by the Spirit of God are the sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of slavery leading again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption, but whom we cry, “Abba, Father.”
Romans 8:12-15 (NET)

Fear enslaves us. Fear enslaves me only because I let it. God has given me the means to overcome my fear by giving me the Spirit of God.

My mind struggles to find a balance between common sense and trust in God. I think that there are some things we just don’t do because they are stupid. I don’t walk down the middle of the freeway, expecting God to keep cars from hitting me. However, my common sense is perhaps in error when it keeps me from doing stupid things for the glory of God. Should I offer a ride to the girl walking down the road? Do I invite the homeless man out for a cup of coffee?

I am struck by the story of Ezra. Ezra was a priest and teacher living in Babylon at the end of Israel’s exile. When the time came, he returned home to Jerusalem to rebuild the Temple. He is with a group of 42,360 men in addition to servants and animals. They carried with them a wealth of gold, sliver, and priestly garments. This group was not inconspicuous as they crossed the hundreds of miles from Babylon to Israel. They were a ripe target for thieves and bandits. But get this, Ezra writes:

I called for a fast there by the Ahava Canal, so that we might humble ourselves before our God and seek from him a safe journey for us, our children, and all our property. I was embarrassed to request soldiers and horsemen from the king to protect us from the enemy along the way, because we had said to the king, “The good hand of our God is on everyone who is seeking him, but his great anger is against everyone who forsakes him.” So we fasted and prayed to our God about this and he answered us….

On the twelfth day of the first month we began traveling from the Ahava Canal to go to Jerusalem. The hand of our God was on us, and he delivered us from our enemy and from bandits along the way. So we came to Jerusalem, and we stayed there for three days.
Ezra 8:21-23; 31-32 (NET)

Here is foolishness for the glory of God. Rather than compromising God’s reputation as sovereign and almighty, Ezra and the gang traveled across the world without guards, without protection. Only they weren’t without protection. God, the One in control of all things, protected them and brought them safely to their destination.

I am working on controlling my fear. It is a slow learning process, but God is renewing me day by day.

I picked up my copy of Victor Hugo’s Les Miserables last summer. I read it in high school. So far, I have only reread the first 380 pages. A good portion of the first of the book focuses on Monseigneur Bienvenu, a man foolish for the glory of God. At one point, the bishop is asked if he is “quite sure if there was not a degree of imprudence in leaving his door, day and night, open to whoever might wish to enter, and if he did not fear that some evil would befall a house so poorly defended.” The bishop answers, “Unless God protects a house, they who guard it watch in vain.” This has become my mantra.

Fear kills my mind. It causes me to think rationally when I should be thinking faithfully. Fear withers my heart. It causes me to overlook the plight of others in order to safeguard my self and my family. Fear cages my soul. It erects a wall between me and my savior, preventing me from fully experiencing the peace of God. Fear quenches my God-given purpose in life. It causes me to retreat within myself and put off till tomorrow what God would have me do today.

Father, I believe. Help my unbelief. (Mark 9:24)

Another New Link

2007-02-22T12:43:00.000-06:00

If you have not heard of the NET Bible (New English Translation), check it out. Because language is a living and evolving thing, it is good to have new Bible translations every 10 years or so. The NET Bible is a recent Bible translation. I think it is wonderful. It uses modern English, but is a close literal translation from the original languages. It was started by a group of people (many of them professors at DTS) who believed that people should not have to pay for the Word of God. Did you know that before the NET, there wasn't an English version of the Bible on the internet in its entirety. Copyright laws wouldn't allow such a thing. So, these people undertook their own translation so that they could put it on the internet to be accessed by all people free of charge. You can buy a bound copy, but the Word of God is free online.

I like it so much because the language flows in my mind. It is not as poetic as the King James, but it is easy to understand. In addition, whenever they translate a phrase is an updated way, or a way that may not be word for word from the original language, there is a footnote telling the word for word interpretation and the way many of the other English versions translate it. So, you get the best of both worlds. It also has great study notes.

New Link

2007-02-20T13:41:00.000-06:00

Check out Bible Girl's blog (link on the right). She is a writer for the Dallas Observer, which is part of the alternative press. In her blog, Julie Lyons addresses current issues from a sound Christian perspective. By this I means she is a believer, and she holds to the authority of Scripture. You may not agree with everything she says, but she holds to belief in Jesus as the only way to God, and she extols the love of Christ to all people. She writes to an audience comprised of believers and those hostile to the faith. However, she responds with grace, love, and truth to all her readers, even those who write mean, hostile remarks to her.

Here is a tiny excerpt from her blog entitled "The Slippery Middle Ground on Gay Marriage" (Sept 13, 2006):

The evangelical faith loses every bit of its meaning and power when it is
separated from love, the eternal principle behind the gospel of Jesus Christ.
But this love is not some squishy, infinitely malleable thing that exists apart
from truth—the truth revealed in the Bible. It is a love that constrains: from
hatred, and from sin.

Comments like these make me shout "Amen" (in my head of course, I was raised Southern Baptist after all), and keep going back for more.

Anyway, it is a good read.

God is so Good

2007-02-17T00:44:00.000-06:00

This is a little slow in coming, but I wanted to share the greatness of God with you. I know many people have received snow this month as those big storm systems have transversed the country. Here in Abilene, TX, snow is a rarity. The old adage is true - if you don't like the weather in Texas, just wait till tomorrow. It will change. I kid you not, on Thursday we had a high of 29 and Friday we were in the 60s. I am used to unpredictable weather.

So, on February 1st, I was at home with Luke, enjoying a lovely rainy day. Rainy days are the best. It was absolutely pouring. I periodically would look out the window to relish the downpour. Then, I looked up and thought, there's something wrong with that rain. I finally figured out that it was snow. There were huge, fluffy snowflakes in the middle of the rain. The shower of rain soon became a shower of snow. I don't think I have ever seen such big, fat, fluffy flakes. Not only were they huge, but they were countless. The air was blanketed in white.

Now, I have lived here long enough to know not to expect the snow to last. An hour after it stopped falling, all remnants of the snow were gone. But, it was beautiful while is lasted.

God is good.

My Belly as Abstract Art

2007-02-16T21:45:00.000-06:00

Alright. You asked for it. Now, I have to qualify that I am not as skinny as I was in college. Nor am I a bikini wearing kinda gal. So, please excuse the flub and severe whiteness. This tummy doesn't see much daylight. However, in my pride, I must also point out that thanks to a daily slathering of stinky lotions during pregnancy, there are no stretch marks on my belly. There may be some on my rear- no one told me I would need to guard against rear end stretchmarks during pregnancy - but not on my belly. Also, I assure you I have showered several time since surgery. The tape residue from the bandages is quite stubborn, and my belly doesn't quite feel like a rough scrub yet. Anyway, here it is:

I measured. The incision is 5 inches, not 6.

Close-up.

That little port hole was a real joy. While I was in the hospital, they had a tube in the hole leading to a little bladder type thing. This was so the fluid would drain out rather than building up inside. The nurse would empty the bladder about once a day until it pretty much stopped draining. Then the fun and games were over, and they pulled the tube out. I nearly jumped out of the bed.

I know. It's a lovely story.

Gutted Like a Fish

2007-02-15T18:21:00.000-06:00

Thanks to all who have been praying for my surgery and recovery. God is taking great care of me.

Everything went well. At least I think it did. Last week is pretty hazy. The surgery lasted about 2 hours. When the doc got in there, it was clear that the cyst/hematoma was in my spleen. It had not attached to anything else, which is very good. He had warned us that it could have been attaching to whatever else it was touching. The only hitch was that it was too big to pull out. He had already made about a six inch incision and didn't want to make it any bigger, so he drained the thing until it was small enough to fit through my six inch whole. I think he said it was 14cm around. They sent the whole thing to pathology. Pathology reported that it was nothing more than a hematoma surrounded by a cyst. I know this sounds strange. I could be remembering wrong. After all, I have been under anesthesia. The last time that happened, I couldn't remember my last name or the year.

As to what caused this thing, no one knows. They said it could have been there for 5 months or 5 years. They kept asking me if I had been in any sort of trauma, like a car accident. No. I think I would remember such a thing. I did have a small accident on a four wheeler last summer (I'll have to tell about that later), but I hit my arm, not my abdomen. Does birthing a 9lb 3oz baby count as trauma? I was traumatized to the point of crying like a child. Maybe Luke hit my spleen in utero. He does have quite the throwing arm.

Anyway, after 6 days in the hospital, I am home and recovering well. I am weening myself off the pain meds. I am now able to survive the day without a pillow held to my side. Soon, I will once again join the ranks of homo erectus.

I have considered posting a picture of my sliced belly for all to see, but I am afraid some might find it gross and offensive. What do you think? Do you want to see my new battle wound?

Out of Commission

2007-02-05T22:09:00.000-06:00

The day has finally arrived. I will be heading to the hospital tomorrow to have my spleen, and its gigantic hematoma removed. If you had not already heard, there is a large thing, they think is a hematoma in my spleen. It is about the size of a nerf football. At its widest point it is 11cm x 13cm, and extends from under my lungs to nearly my waist. Things are a bit squashed on the left side of my abdomen. So, as soon as I am once again coherent enough and have internet connection, I will let you know how things turned out. If you are lucky, I will have pictures to post as well.

Me and My Guys

2007-02-02T23:39:00.000-06:00

As requested, here are pictures of the three of us.

January 1, 2006: You can't see Luke, but he's there. I am 32 weeks pregnant. This is at the shower Adam's school had for us, which is why we are standing in a library.

March 5, 2006: Whoa Baby! I am 5 days away from my due date, but only have two days to go. At the time I didn't think I was that big. However, the picture shows I was HUGE!

March 26, 2006: Luke is 2 1/2 weeks old. It is Luke's first time to visit Grandpa D and Grandma D's house (Adam's dad and Adam's dad's wife). Grandma D and Oma (Grandma D's mother) made this lovely quilt for Luke to play and have tummy time on.

Okay, I have to confess, there are pictures of the three of us in the hospital, but nobody needs to see those. I am not one of those women who looks human after spending 13 1/2 hours in labor, 2 1/2 of which were pushing out a 9lb 3oz child.

April 23, 2006: This is our first family portrait. Luke is 6 1/2 weeks old. He is wearing his "coming home" outfit. He is so tiny and handsome! It's not a great picture of Adam, but Luke's hands were covering his face in the only picture in which Adam's eyes were completely open.

Sadly, that is the last picture of the three of us together, unless you count awkward snapshots where no one is looking at the camera. Actually, we do have some that were taken professionally, but I don't have digital copies of them.

Humble Pie

2007-02-02T14:28:00.000-06:00

It is a universal truth accepted by all women that she who cuts her own bangs not only is a fool, but will look the fool for the following two months. (sorry, Ms. Austen) As a woman, I knew and believed this. As a woman, I thought I was the exception.

I loved my bangs. They were part of my new look, post child-bearing. I hadn’t had bangs since I was in middle school. The bangs were my favorite part of the new ’do. However, I am blessed with fast growing hair. So, it doesn’t take long for the perfect bangs to become annoying, I can’t see, ouch! something’s in my eyes bangs.

Now, I must also admit, that I have a wonderful hair guy – Teddy. Teddy gave me my first haircut. When I lived in California, I would wait until I was home to get a haircut from Teddy. He has cut the hair of my mother, father, brother, sister-in-law, nephews, and husband. In fact, I had to take Adam to be approved by Teddy before I could marry him. As an amazing guy, Teddy told me that whenever my bangs need to be cut, all I have to do is swing by and he will cut them for free. I have done this before, and true to his word, Teddy shortened my fringe for a smile. However, in my mind, it was a hassle to pack up the baby and drive the mile to the salon.

So, as the bangs grew ever more annoying and blinding, my patience ebbed and my courage flowed. Upon exiting the shower Saturday night with freshly washed hair, I boldly grabbed the scissors and made what I thought to be a very conservative cut that would leave my front hair longer than I actually wanted. As soon as the offending ends fell away, I knew the sad truth of the matter…I’m a fool. How hair cut even with the pupils of my eyes can spring back to the middle of my forehead is beyond me.

The following day, the family rang with a chorus, “Why didn’t you go see Teddy?” Because I am a fool.

To bring the whole episode to a poignant end and drive the lesson home to Christin’s heart…Adam and I were shopping for birthday cards last night. In the rummage I picked up a cute card with a black and white picture of a little girl making a funny face. The top of the card read, “At least now you are old enough,” and inside, “to know not to cut your own bangs.” I flipped back to the front. The middle section of the little girl’s bangs were cut to her scalp.

I thank God for humility and a sense of humor.

To completely purge my soul, I here submit a picture taken today. What is left of my bangs shall stay clipped back until they are once again suitable for viewing by all ages.

Pictures

2007-02-01T16:35:00.000-06:00

I don't have many pictures of me, because I am the family photographer. However, you may enjoy the pictures of my beautiful family. God has blessed me greatly.

Luke is nearly 11 months old.

This is my new "Mommy Haircut." I like it. I am with my sisters-in-law. Annie is in the middle with Will. Amy is on the right with Sam. Sam and Will are Amy's twins.

This is my wonderful husband Adam. He is such a gift from God.

This is me pre-haircut. Luke is only two months old. He's so tiny!

Jumping In

2007-02-01T14:38:00.000-06:00

Well, I've now followed my friends over the cliff into blog world. It helps that these friends are some of the people I admire most.

So, I now have a new nap time activity.

May my words and my thoughts be acceptable in your sight, O LORD, my sheltering rock and my redeemer. Psalm 19:14 (NET)